Still thinking constantly about it even though all I did was spend my time cleaning Kami-sama’s room.
‘Filth.. I had to sweep Kami-sama’s filth.’
The sun had already set.
Already lying on the bed, but I couldn’t help but look at my hand.
The sensation of that being gripped still lingered.
That ‘hand’ might be just me imagining things, but I couldn’t shake Adoracion-sama’s words off my head.
‘Former appearance…’
Kami-sama’s body wrapped in dirt kept on appearing in my head after hearing those words.
There’s no basis for this and yet –
‘Maybe Kami-sama became that way because of some circumstances…’
If his filthiness was purified, he would return to his original state.
That way, nobody would detest him anymore, and maybe he’ll be treated just like the other deities.
‘If nothing was done, he would continue keeping all those burdens.’
He had to listen to all the grudges of other people.
No, at that time, it wasn’t something half-baked as ‘listening to grudges’.
It was as if my heart was being pierced and wrenched apart, that twisted feeling, something similar to miserable pain, beating inside my head.
Kami-sama had been carrying all that for how many years, how many decades already.
‘I’m just a proxy. I’m going to give up sooner or later, you know?’
Haven’t heard anything from my father or my fiance, but pretty sure they were also doing whatever they could. They probably didn’t give up on me yet.
‘I also have a fiance, and we’re going to get married soon. They’re setting the date soon. I can’t continue being a saintess.’
There’s no way the engagement would be broken now, and I myself didn’t have that intention.
Had been looking forward to that marriage, too.
‘I was only forced by Amalda. Just a temporary proxy… And yet…’
“Is there something I can do for him…”
Now that I knew Kami-sama’s situation, leaving the Shrine without doing anything just like this would be in bad taste.
Of course, I wasn’t some saint, nor am I fond of sacrificing myself for others.
That’s why, sorry, but I would never think of breaking that engagement off.
‘But – ’
“While I am still here in the Shrine, even for just a bit..”
Maybe there’s still a way to improve their treatment of Kami-sama.
Cuddled my pillow while immersed in these thoughts.
“I can’t repay him otherwise…”
Kami-sama was exhausted, yet nobody else noticed.
Even the Shrine that prided itself in worshiping the deities were treating him as a fool, calling him “incompetent god.”
But Kami-sama didn’t even resent them for that, he didn’t get angry, and never even said a word of complaint.
“Kami-sama’s too meek. He should’ve said a lot of things!”
If it’s me, I wouldn’t rest, yammering and nagging on until I got what’s rightfully mine.
Many people thought I was too noisy, but it couldn’t be helped, nobody would hear me otherwise.
But Kami-sama had that personality.
He would never assert himself – so he’s currently receiving the worst treatment as the incompetent god.
Actually, nobody believed me.
When I told the priest, he just scolded me, saying “Stop that foolish nonsense. This land has been loved by the deities, so there’s no such thing as ‘filth’.
‘Even the priests are totally unreliable! Ugh!’
Unwittingly groaned after getting mad again – I rolled on the bed again, still clutching the pillow and started kicking , totally careless of my appearance.
Of course, this is my own room, and already locked the door, too.
As if –-
“Why did I have to worry over this! There’s a limit to being too kind! Really, stop noticing and thinking about every single thing!”
“– Kind? Who are you talking about?”
Never imagined that an unfamiliar deity would be lying beside me while I was venting out with all my might.
“Hmmm. So this is his prospective saintess… What, unexpectedly plain, huh.”
Translucent golden hair, gorgeous face – this deity boy stared at me, then he smirked.
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