The signing session went well. That evening, Ugin-san and I visited Tsuruās apartment and we ateĀ takoyakiĀ together.
Apparently, Tsuru had been recommending Ugin-san to various areas in Tokyo. Since Ugin-san was a newcomer in the city, she needed all the help she could get, so Tsuruās help was a godsend to her. By the way, she chose a science course at her university. She made steady progress to realize her dream to go to space.
Back before she took her entrance exam, she was worried about having to leave her brother behind in Sendai. She consulted me about it and I told her to not let that bother her. After all, Sui would hate it if she decided to throw her dream away because of him.
In the end, she decided to go to Tokyo. She left Sendai and entrusted Sui to me when we parted at Sendai stationās ticket gate. She left me with a ridiculously heavy responsibility, but I felt happy because, that meant, in a way, she had acknowledged me.
* Ā * Ā *
I turned 21 this summer.
I became even older. In the past, getting a year older meant significant growth. Back when I was a grade school student, being a year older had a great importance. Now that I was an adult though, it felt nothing special.
It was currently my third year at the university. More and more people started to look for jobs in earnest and they began to study hard to graduate faster. As for me, I did nothing of that sort. I had no company that I wanted to work in, nor did I have a particular job I wanted to do. All I wanted to do was to continue writing. I was thinking about becoming a full-fledged writer in my apartment.
I always hated the summer heat, but at the same time, I admired its beauty.
The lush and green trees, the pleasant sound of the Hirose River, the clear blue sky and the voices of the insects that served as my lullaby at night.
āNghā¦ā
I lied down and closed my eyes. I had to come up with an idea for a new story, but I couldnāt come up with any. This was how my summer vacation had been going. Trying to come up with an idea and whenever I couldnāt come up with anything, I took a walk, went into a cafe for a change of pace or went to observe other peopleās lives.
So, I decided to go out. I put some sunscreen on my arms and left my apartment. The sunlight reflected off the sidewalk and almost burned my eyes. Today was a hot day and the forecast said that the temperature would steadily rise until it reached 29°C.
I walked along the banks of the Hirose River. Despite the heat, there were families having barbeque parties here. Was it because the heat was more bearable near the river? Regardless of what their reasoning was, the scene was quite lovely. This kind of casual activity always moved me in ways that words couldnāt ever describe.
When I went to a cafe, I found an elderly couple there. They were sitting there, facing each other while sipping their coffees wordlessly. I almost let out my tears when I saw them. I didnāt know why I almost cried, probably because the scene was so beautiful, at least to me.
Either that or it was because I missed humanās warmth.
I used to hate people. Reading a book in my loneliness was my favorite pastime, but now, the same loneliness I used to embrace became a poison that corroded my soul.
It was all thanks to him. Thanks to him, I came to hate solitude and began yearning for humanās warmth. In the past, I would never have stood up in the spotlight. I would never have agreed to do a signing session. I would never have gotten involved with anyone. But thanks to him⦠Because I fell in love with himā¦
Suddenly, my train of thoughts was stopped by my ringing phone.
[Sakaki Ugin]
I froze.
Ugin-san rarely called me out of the blue. Most of the time, we only communicated via texts. That meant this was an urgent call.
Chills went running down my spine. There was nothing more frightening in this world than an urgent call from her.
I took a deep breath because I realized that I had stopped breathing for a while. I put the phone to my ear.
āHello?ā
āArina-san! My brother! Heāā
* Ā * Ā *
I ran.
I learned to stop running outside when I turned into an adult. Yet, here I was, running down the road as if I were a grade schooler.
On the way, I found a cab. I waved my hand and went inside. The destination, the general hospital.
Sitting inside the cab, I began to reminisce about my memories with him.
I met him.
I played tennis with him.
I brought him flowers.
I modeled in the art club with him.
I told him about my dual personality.
We went around the school festival together.
I invited him to my house.
I fell in love with him.
We went to the aquarium together.
Shirona confessed her feelings to him.
We went to the end-of-the-year party together.
I went to his house.
My fatherās death.
My memory loss.
I fell in love with him again.
We ran together in the sports festival.
I lost him again.
I saw him in his sickbed for the very first time.
He had been standing by my side ever since we first met.
I recalled my memory of him over and over. I was supposed to be the sun who guided him with my light yet, it was him, the comet, who showed his beautiful tail to guide me through the darkness. He never once showed his dislike toward me, even though I was a problem child with a foul mouth. Instead, he warmed my heart with his funny jokes.
I had forgotten those memories, but from now on, I will never forget him ever again.
Thatās why.
I hope that he wonāt forget about me either.
* Ā * Ā *
As soon as I entered the hospital, the receptionist rushed toward me. I had visited the hospital so many times over the past three years, so they recognized my face when they saw it. Some of the hospital staff even read my book.
I opened my mouth forcefully as I was unable to catch my breath in a short time.
āExcuse me⦠Visitorās passāā
The receptionist rubbed my back, trying to calm me down.
āSakaki Ugin-san has already taken care of all the procedures. You can put this around your neck.ā
āThank you very much.ā
I bowed my head and rushed to the elevator.
I entered the elevator when it arrived and hit the button to the fifth floor. Then, it slowly ascended toward the destination as the numbers on the top of the door flashed one by one.
After a while, the elevator reached the fifth floor and the door opened. I stepped out into the stark white hallway and turned right. Room 512, 513, 514⦠As I got closer to my destination, my heartbeat started to beat faster to the point that it hurt my chest.
Room 520.
Finally, it was the room I had visited so many times.
I let out a deep breath and knocked on the door. From inside, I heard Ugin-sanās muffled voice.
I placed my hand on the door and slowly slid it open. Each of my movements seemed to be in slow motion. It was as if the world was telling me to take my time and savor this moment.
Inside, I saw his father, mother and Ugin-san. And of course, he was there, laying down on his bed.
āYo⦠Itās been a while⦠Is the Earth safe?ā
Ah⦠Itās him⦠Itās the Sakaki Sui I knewā¦
At that moment, I broke down and cried. My face was covered in tears and snot, definitely a face I wouldnāt want him to see. But, I couldnāt stop the tears from leaking out. The only thing I could hear at that moment was my ugly sobbing that I couldnāt contain within my trembling mouth.
It felt like it was raining outside. My hands were wet, my sleeves and thighs were drenched. I probably look really miserable now. I couldnāt help it. It was hard for me to keep my composure in this situation.
I mean, cāmonā¦
Finally, I was reunited with the love of my life.
Probably, there was someone out there in this world who could keep their composure in this kind of situation. But sadly, that āsomeoneā wasnāt me.