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Chapter 76 - Forgiveness
“And you brought Lady Mellin while running up to see me?” Ella asked.
“I… Hah. I wasn’t thinking of her.”
This man was certainly the most foolish and simple person in the world. ‘You weren’t thinking of the woman standing right next to you? Is that an excuse?’
Ella had to let out a sigh instead. Cladis thought he should find a shovel and dig a hole to hide as he saw her bewilderment. He truly couldn’t think of anything at the time. The moment he saw the flower blooming, he was already moving towards her. He forgot about Clara by his side. Only the thought that he had to see Ella since she was here, controlled him.
‘If I did not hear Ella’s claim that she would break the engagement, I would have hugged her.’
But he couldn’t say that to Ella. That was a stupid idea, and it was good that he hadn’t. Even if he met Clara to break up with her, he shouldn’t have done that when he went there with another woman. The more he thought about it, the more he realized he wasn’t himself that day.
Ella delved into her thoughts while looking at his face filled with regrets, ‘What’s Luciella to Cladis?’
Thinking of how Cladis grew up, it wasn’t so strange for him to throw everything aside and come running for Ella only because she was there. He had shown that multiple times in the novel. To him, Luciella was such a being.
But this Cladis had already given the title of first love to someone else. If that was the case, what was Ella to him now? She needed to know, so she asked, “Do you like me?”
“Yes. I like you. I can’t even think of myself without you.”
His answer came instantly, and his eyes sparkled as if it was a lie that he had looked depressed up until now. Ella was shocked to see that he seemed happy to claim that he liked her.
That’s why she wanted to make sure. It felt like his feelings were like that because he was the protagonist of the novel. It reminded her of Xylem, who tried hard to resist but still gave in to Ella in the end, and herself, who was giving in to him as well…
Maybe all of these feelings weren’t of their own. ‘What should I do if that’s the case? If these feelings aren’t my own, what can I do?’
What about Clara, who had tried her best for the past eight months? Maybe yesterday at the Magical Tower, she had felt confused that Ella was feeling this way now. What did she think when she saw Cladis and Xyle were focused on Ella no matter what she did?
She was sure she couldn’t bear it anymore. Such a hollow feeling that she couldn’t resist but had to pass out overwhelmed Ella as well.
“Then what was Lady Mellin to you? She was your first love. Right? Even then, you only treated the relationship like it was for a limited time and cut it off when it was over. I’m not even your first love, which is known to be special, so how can you be so sure?”
“You and Clara are different. It’s different because…”
Cladis became hesitant, trailed off, then looked at Ella. He couldn’t imagine what consequences his actions that he was thinking about would bring. But he couldn’t find another way to explain it. He noticed that Ella’s defenses had weakened a bit and immediately put his thoughts into action.
Ella was shocked by something touching her cheeks and froze with her eyes wide open. She even stopped breathing at the warm and soft flesh. Then she looked astonishingly at Cladis for his unbelievable actions.
Cladis’s face was so red that it was hard to put it into words, and he hid his hands back while he stood far away from her. He stood behind a couch as if he found it relieved to have something between him and Ella while watching her.
‘Are you a kid? Huh?’
She became furious at Cladis standing there like an innocent boy when it was him who kissed her first. Ella suppressed her rage and pressed her head with her finger as it started to hurt from the stress. Her softened heart was about to grow cold again.
Cladis became shocked by how fast Ella’s expression darkened and quickly began to make excuses. He thought she might hate it but did not imagine it would be to this extent, so his voice shook with desperation, “I understand my actions were rude and startled you. But it was faster to explain it like this than with my words…”
“What do you mean by that?”
If someone could kill another just by looking, Cladis would have died here. That’s how fierce Ella’s glare was. He hesitated for a while, then made a look like he had been freed from all burden and continued as if he had promised himself.
“I won’t try to cover myself up to you anymore. It just feels like I make things worse when I try.”
“Good that you know that.”
He chuckled even as she snapped as if it was obvious for Ella to react in that way. She stopped trying to lash out at him any further. Cladis recognized her hesitation, let out a huge sigh, and comforted himself. After hesitating for a while, he was able to continue his words, “Friends from the Academy told me that I’m either g*y or a eunuch.”
‘Those m*therf***rs!’ thought Ella.