Chapter 5

【These beautiful photos meant to make ones swallowing their saliva unconsciously, and making their mouth dry.】

There was a place called Jinjiang[1], the monitoring was strict, a straightforward scene would very likely be banned or locked. 555 didn’t dare to take that risk. So it had to give a subtle hint like that.

But facing a straight forward person like Zuo Bian, such an ambiguous hint, of course, would not be caught.

In Zuo Bian’s mind, the thing that makes one’s to look thirsty and hungry is, of course, delicious meal![2]

Zuo Bian was surprisingly quite talented at photography.

In the photo, crispy, golden fried chicken chests and legs and nuggets were crammed on a white plate covered with green lettuce, and droplets of soda water was dripping from the side of the full glass. There were little bubbles. As the afternoon sun slanted down, those glistening droplets of water diffused the light.

At first glance it looks like a photo that was taken from the internet, but these photos were indeed taken by Zuo Bian.

“I’m not sure if this what it meant, but I think it’s a pretty appetizing photos.”

【Well… it does look beautiful and appetizing…】

It does make the mouth dry and want to swallow, 555 was a system, yet as it looked at these, it wanted to eat and drink.

But–

That’s not the ‘beautiful photos’ the Green Tea manual means! It means showing off long, white, slender, beautiful legs and flashing a deep cleavage to the other party for just a few seconds! ☆★

Is it too late for me to change the Green Tea manual?

Such beautiful photos was wrong photos, and Qin Ai would definitely not take the bait!

“Ah, she replied to me. Gulp.” Zuo Bian took a sip of soda from her cup and exclaimed, “This water taste is so good.”

【What is her reply?】

“A full stop.” Zuo Bian said.

【The mission progress bar went up, now 0.9%, which means she’s not annoyed at you, that’s fine.】

Zuo Bian ate more fried chicken, “Well, I’ll keep working on it.”

【Host, I think you need to learn about this world first, it will help you with your strategy】.

Otherwise what the host misunderstood this fake Green Tea manual again next time? By the way, the first thing to do is to get involved with the internet.

It’s a world with very advanced internet technology, and one can get all kinds of interesting information from the internet without leaving home.

555 is going to expose its host to the cyber world, and soon its host won’t be ‘simple’ anymore!

“555 You’re right, there is so much I don’t understand. And I can’t be ashamed of seeking education, so I’ve decided to live and learn. I’ve decided to start studying from the first grade, and my teacher has praised me for being smart, so I think it won’t take me more than two or three years to catch up with my current age!”

【Wait, wait, wait, wait! That’s not really necessary.】

555 immediately yelled.

“Why?”

【What if Qin Ai got married during your two or three years of studying? Can you finish the mission? Learn to read first, and I’ll teach you the rest as I walk you through the walkthrough. And I have a shortcut to learn about the world that will help you understand a lot.】

“Hmmm, you’re right, I’ll listen to you. So what’s that method?”

【It’s easy, that’s what it is… to play with your phone.】

Zuo Bian wiped his greasy hands and held up the phone, then nodded with a serious face, “Well, I’m going to start playing. What should I play?”

555 didn’t only download WeChat, but it also downloaded a lot of APPs, all because 555 kept talking about the icon of the name of these APP, so Zuo Bian has clicked and downloaded them all.

Now 555 was facing so much APP that 555 got worried.

“Just browse the web to get the news of the world first.”

-This is wrong! Very harmful! Don’t give your child a mobile phone!-

A pop up notification appeared and Zuo Bian immediately clicked it. [3]

555: 【…】

555 is really going to be 555.

“This article says that playing on your phone is bad for your eyes, wow! And could also be blind!? Well, I think that’s right, playing too much with phone is overkill, we have to control the time when playing.” Zuo Bian nodded her head in agreement as she read.

【Host, let’s look at some other APP, why don’t we play this MOBA game! King Of Valor![4] You, an ancient woman, have to keep up with the youth’s trend.】

Zuo Bian clicked on the APP icon and started the game.

[Zuo Bian Zuo Bian! Hey! Zuo Bian, there’s someone in the bushes! Why are you standing still? Ah! You’re dead!][5]

“I thought you were calling my name.” Zuo Bian was guilty as she looked at the team chat and as she was waiting for the resurrection, she learned about her hero’s skills in the short few seconds.

After the resurrection, Zuo Bian was obviously becoming much more powerful, but the act of giving off easy first blood in ranked match has made her teammates dissatisfied, and someone was already chatting on the world chat.

‘Fuck, what bad luck, meeting elementary school students level again. Let’s report it directly later.’

‘You play like shit! It’s all because your dad didn’t teach you properly.’

‘This kind of elementary school student should go home and do homework, what’s the point of playing ranked to trouble others.’

The enemy was also mocking her, ‘Where is that non-mainstream player of yours, we were at a disadvantageous EXP and Gold here, so why don’t you quickly come over to be killed?’

Zuo Bian’s IGN, which 555 picked out, is called Don’t Chat Me, which is indeed very non-mainstream.[6]

【I’m so mad at them! Let me troll them back!】

Zuo Bian didn’t even pay attention to those chat, she already had a general understanding of the game. She camped in the enemy side to grab EXP and Gold for herself, made powerful equipments, then popped out to slaughter an enemy team, and eventually she leveled up quickly. [7]

The system used its ability to invade the phone to type a hell loads of wall of text, large paragraph of words kept popping up, those talking to Zuo Bian occasionally would say two words and they were instantly drowned out, with no chance to counterattack.

Zuo Bian’s three teammates were trolling each other with the system, the two people on the enemy team were watching the show in amusement, so there were only five people in the whole ranked match who were seriously playing the 5v5 game.

Zuo Bian was silently leveling up, followed by a Tank, a real elementary school player level called Today Is A Big Sunny Day (Jin Tian shi ge da Qin Tian).[8]

Zuo Bian’s leveling up speed was frightening, who dared to come to her was killed immediately, the enemy KDA record never leaving 0/×/0, and sometimes she got assisted by Today Is A Big Sunny Day.

Zuo Bian paid attention to the turrets and minions, rushed to push the upper lane, and the enemy heroes trying to block her were torn easily like paper in front of the overpowered Zuo Bian.

Moments later, Zuo Bian’s character got to the enemy base, blew up the Crystal Core, and the teammates who were still cursing at the chat, looked at the screen with confused faces, not understanding what just happened. ‘What happened!?’

Zuo Bian remembered someone was saying they were going to report her, and she reported all her teammates except Today Is A Big Sunny Day, and 555 filled the reason for the report.

Her teammates were all 0/0/0, and the report would absolutely be successful.

Today Is A Big Sunny Day’s KDA record is 0/0/3, it was the first time he achieved such good results, immediately send her a friend request.

Today Is A Big Sunny Day: Hello Hello, please God can we play together? You’re so good at this! I heard from my mom that my sister used to be a gamer too, but she was busy working every day and never played with me. By the way, this is my QQ[9] ******.

Zuo Bian who was slow at typing’s response: I don’t have a QQ.

It wasn’t as if Zuo Bian didn’t know what QQ is, but it’s true that she didn’t create a QQ account.

If it was an ordinary person, he would definitely think that Zuo Bian doesn’t want to add himself, but the simple Qin Tian didn’t think so, he taught Zuo Bian very enthusiastically how to create a QQ,

Zuo Bian went to create a QQ and also added Today Is A Big Sunny Day as a friend.

From the avatar and the behavior, Zuo Bian thought Today Is A Big Sunny Day looked young, he kept asking her to play more.

Zuo Bian thought he was a good person and play a few more ranked matches with Today Is A Big Sunny Day.

Zuo Bian had a special talent on gaming, and winning a few games in a row with Today Is A Big Sunny Day.

Today Is A Big Sunny Day: Two hours is up, I can’t play anymore, thanks God for carrying me! I love you! づ ￣3￣ づ

Although Today Is A Big Sunny Day can no longer play the game for today, but there’s still QQ. He immediately turned to QQ to chat with Zuo Bian.

Today Is A Big Sunny Day: great god great god, do you still have time to play with me next time? I’m a good boy and will try not to hold you back.

Zuo Bian: Good.

Today Is A Big Sunny Day: That’s great! God, let me introduce myself, my name is Qin Tian, I’m 13 years old, I’m in the second year of junior high school, I’m not an elementary school student. What’s your name?

555 couldn’t help but comment: 【I’ve never seen anyone introduce themselves so well, but this kid’s name sounds familiar.】

Zuo Bian: My name is Zuo Bian and I’m 21 years old. Today is the first time I played this game.

Qin Tian: Wow! That’s awesome! The first time you play and you’re so awesome, you must be better than my sister.

555 【Host you quickly ask him what his sister’s name is, I remember Qin Ai had a brother!】

Zuo Bian: Is your sister’s name Qin Ai?

Qin Tian: !!!! How do you know that? The God, are you so powerful? You can guess what my sister’s name is!

Zuo Bian didn’t think she could meet Qin Ai’s brother by playing a random game.

Zuo Bian: I want to get to know your sister better.

Qin Tian: You want to spar with her? That’s hard now because she isn’t playing games and is busy working every day. I don’t believe her, she’s always late or just doesn’t show up, hmph ╭(╯^╰)╮ bad big sister!

Zuo Bian continued talking to Qin Tian. She didn’t guide him, and now she knew the situation on Qin Tian’s home.

Zuo Bian not only knew Qin Tian’s school name, but she also knew the result of Qin Tian’s last monthly exam.

【It’s a miracle how on earth this kid could grow up in peace. I didn’t doubt he could be tricked for a lollipop.】

“He’s so cute, he told me what I wanted to know before I asked him.” Zuo Bian’s eye was curved and she was very happy.

【Now we know that the Female Lead Qin Ai is going to pick up her brother tomorrow, we can arrive early and pretend to have a fateful encounter.】

“Okay!” Zuo Bian put the phone down and ate all the fried chickens and nuggets that had gone cold.[10]

Footnote:

[1] jjwxc, this 4th wall breaking

[2] Hahaha MC thinks the girls on the photos looks thirsty and hungry, so she thinks the photo means to take photos that would arouse thirst/hunger

[3] Hahaha MC falls for clickbait news.

[4] The name is censored, but it’s implied to be King of Strike/Area Of Valor. If you’re unfamiliar with MOBA, just think of it like DOTA 2.

[5] Zuo Bian’s name literally means on the left/left side. So when her teammates keep saying Zuo Bian to warn her the hidden enemy on the left, she thought they were calling her.

It should be like this: [On your left, on your left! Hey! On your left, there’s someone in the bushes! Why are you standing still? Ah! You’re dead!]

[6] IGN: In Game Name

[7] Hahaha MC camped at enemy side, surprise attack! I think MC used DPS class Jungler, so yeah, if you’re a jungler and you’re a noob, people would get mad. The jungler/Assassin needed to be a pro player – … btw I never played Jungler, always Tank or Marksman or Mage haha.

[8] Qin Tian’s name could mean Clear Sky / Sunny Day. This… There is a chinese pun on the name, so I also shared the Chinese IGN.

[9] An Instant Messenger developed by Tencent, the developer of Area Of Valor, the game MC played.

[10] Hahaha literal Winner Winner Chicken Dinner