Riff was completely out of breath. Has he ever ran as much as he had today? Riff ran so much that he remembered the time during his childhood when he ran for dear life after encountering a pack of wolves while he was out gathering firewood. He ran deep, deep into the forest.
âThis far should be enough.â
Compared to Riff, the mage seemed relaxed. She had taken care of the couple of goblins that had been chasing after them.
âHaah!â
Once he heard those words, Riff dropped to the ground. He flopped over almost to the point of rolling. The ground was bumpy with rocks and roots, but he didnât have the energy to be concerned about those things. His heart felt so bloated that he thought it might explode and his lower stomach hurt greatly. This was because he hadnât run properly.
âTsk tsk tsk. What a sloppy man. This is why women are better than men.â
âHkâŠâŠhah, hahâŠâŠ.â
âThe love between a man and a woman is inferior and the love between a woman and a woman is noble. The love between a man and a man is somewhere in between, but itâs only better because it doesnât interfere with women. Here you go.â
The woman held her staff above Riffâs face like a fishing line. Water started to flow out of the end of her staff once she muttered something quietly.
âAh. Open your mouth. Aah.â
âUgggrglâŠâŠpbbh.â
âThere you go. You look like a fish.â
Riff waved his hand weakly. The women continued for 5 more seconds even though she knew what that gesture meant. However, once she saw that he didnât react any further than waving his hand, she clicked her tongue and put away her staff.
âMii-n, min, minmin.
The final cries of cicadas filled the forest. Riffâs consciousness felt distant. His sense of balance was faint and he felt dizzy as if his head was filled with hot steam. The woman kept talking excitedly next to him, but her words didnât enter his ears properly.
It might have been because of the cold water that had entered his mouth, but his senses were slowly returning. At that same moment, he began to comprehend what the woman was saying.
âHeâs been looking at the battle from a different perspective since the beginning. Hey, Mr. Leader. You only thought about conquering the Demon Lord Castle, right?â
âHahâŠâŠof, courseâŠâŠ.â
âYeah. You mustâve.â
She nodded.
âIn the first place, Demon Lord castles are like that for adventurers. Itâs the same for Demon Lords as well. Demon Lord castles are something you have to protect from being conquered, thatâs the gist of it. But that Dantalian is different!â\n
She whispered excitedly.
âDantalian was looking beyond his Demon Lord castle while the adventurers were busy focusing on it. He was looking right at the adventurers. He knew that it didnât matter where he fought the adventurers as long as he could defeat them. Keke, should I call it a different plane of thinking? Heâs not a foe that a person who used to be a lumberjack can handle.â
âThis fucking bitchâŠâŠ.â
Riff weakly clenched his jaw.
âDifferent plane of thinking, my ass. Fuck, all that bastard Demon Lord did was run away from a disadvantageous battlefield cause heâs a coward.â
âOh?â
âLook, we were able to take that Demon Lord fuckerâs money because of that. Although we lost all of it other than my share because everyone diedâŠâŠin any case, that guy is a cowardly and stupid bastard.â
âI see.â
The woman looked down at Riff coldly as if she were looking at a fat fly.
âThis is why men suck. Instead of thinking that they lost because they were outmatched, they think they lost because of their own blunder. Hey, you grain of rice that can only use its head as a washbasin, he didnât run away from a disadvantageous battlefield, he deliberately chose a battlefield thatâs advantageous for him. Do you not understand that? Tsk tsk. Furthermore, you sure talk a lot for someone who couldnât have gotten into the Demon Castleâs vault if it werenât for my magic.â
The woman let out a sigh. She lost interest in Riff.
She stretched like one of the fir trees next to her.
âYup. Getting some fresh air for the first time in a long time is nice. I get the desire to live my life only saying refreshing and right things today. This might sound a little insane, but even I want to live my life speaking elegantly and civilly. Iâm serious. Iâm in a good mood since itâs been a long time since I last saw a great strategy.â
ââŠâŠ.â
Until now, Riff thought that the mage was a pushover with flowers in her head. He had no other choice but to change this perception of his. The person in front of him kept chattering on endlessly, and to make things worse, she kept muttering to herself even though she had no conversational partner.
âIf I trace back to when the adventurers made a mistake, then itâs the fact that they went out of their way to pillage other villages. If I trace back even further, then itâs the fact that they never expected the villages would become the main battlefield. This is because of their fixed idea of Demon Lord castles. Hm, thinking about it now, I have a rough grasp of why he used the goblins as his main force.â
âUpsie daisy.â
Riff struggled to push himself up. He felt like if he left her alone, then she would review what happened eternally. He had recovered his senses somewhat, so he had to run away even further in case they still had pursuers.
âAfter this battle is over, there will only be 7 human villages left on this mountain range. Adding to that, all 7 villages are allies that obey Dantalian. If it becomes like that, the goblins would outnumber the humans. Even if you combine all 7 villages, theyâll barely have 300 people while the goblins have 400 fighters alone. They wouldnât stand a chance.â
Dantalian did his best to intentionally diminish the number of goblins, the mage concluded.
âWhile the adventurers were looking at the battle with a narrow-sighted point of view, Dantalian was looking one, two moves ahead. He even considered the ecosystem between the monsters and the humans! Keke, seriously. Thereâs no way mere adventurers could stand a chance againstâŠâŠ.â
âYeah. Yeah. That Demon Lord bastard is great and youâre greater. Well-off people should suck each otherâs ass. Iâll be going first.â
âHm?â \nRiff trudged down a forest path. He intended to find a high ridge and confirm his location first. As long as he could get a grasp of the areaâs geography from the summit, then he should be able to reach a city within a few days of walking.
âFuck. Do I have to start from the beginning again?â
Due to this battle, Riff had lost the rest of his comrades that came from the same village as him. Once this thought crossed his mind, the desire for revenge dyed his insides black.
âNo, not yet. I need to focus on getting to a city right now.â
The mountain range wasnât a place that was simple enough to survive while having other thoughts. Riff knew this better than anyone else as a lumberjack. Letâs first be grateful for having survived that hellish battlefield and it wonât be too late to think about other things later, Riff convinced himself like this as he walked.
âHey. Where are you going?â
The womanâs voice came from behind him. Riff spat on the grass.
âWhat do you mean where am I going? Fuck. Iâm getting off this shitty mountain range.â
âHm? You canât leave, though.â
The woman gave a long sigh.
âAll right. Iâm in a good mood today. And I canât pretend as if the past few days with your group never happenedâŠâŠ. Hey, you ignorant lumberjack bastard. Donât take more than 5 steps from there.â
âYeah yeah. Youâre really great. If youâre going to follow me, then do whatâŠâŠ.â
âI warned you to not take more than 5 steps.â
It was at that moment.
â Slice.
Riffâs ankle was severed by âsomethingâ as he continued to walk while ignoring the womanâs warning.
ââŠâŠHuh?â
Riff fell over helplessly. He didnât fall over in an unsightly manner or anything. He simply tumbled because he could no longer put any strength into his right ankle. He skillfully cushioned his fall with his arms and left foot.
âHuh? Guh? I canâtâŠâŠ.â
Riff made a face as he wondered if the exhaustion of the battlefield had finally caught up to him. He tried to get back up several times, but he couldnât put any strength into his right foot to push himself back up. No, he couldnât feel anything. Be it the sensation of his foot firmly supporting his entire body or the tension transferred through his muscles from his heels up to his thigh, he couldnât feel any of these things.
âFuck, what happened.â
âI gave you a clear warning.â
\nâIâll only tell you this once, so listen carefully. No one has ever received this much kindness from me before dying. Now then, Iâm Rank 8th, Demon Lord Barbatos and I noticed that Paimonâs idiotic fans were trying to do something to Dantalian, so I came here in secret to help Dantalian in case he got fucked up. Thus, I transformed into a human and approached you on purpose, and, fortunately, you took the bait thinking that I was a pushover, but you were the pushover all along.â
âWhat? Demon Lord? The hell are you saying?â
âDantalian fought unexpectedly well, so I lost the chance to make my appearance. Iâm in a good mood now because Iâve finally met a good younger generation Demon Lord after such a long time. Similar to how lions shove their children off ledges to make them grow stronger, Iâm thinking about doing the same as well. And, finally, I was thinking about using this opportunity to ask Dantalian to clean up the pieces of trash that donât act like Demon Lords. Is that enough? I told you everything.â
WaitâRiff uttered as he raised his hand.
The woman, Rank 8th, Demon Lord Barbatos smiled.
She spoke.
âNo. I told you to speak formally, didnât I, you son of a bitch?â
Barbatosâs index finger bobbed teasingly.
Riff felt something similar to a weak breeze go through his forehead. That was it. Riff felt nothing, thought nothing, and collapsed. It was a death without any pain whatsoever.
âKuuuuuh.â
Barbatos raised her body and did some lower back stretches. After she finished her neck exercises, she looked down at Riffâs corpse.
âHm. How will I give a hint to that baby Dantalian?â
She put her hand to her chin as she thought.
After a while, she let out an âAhâ and brought her fist to her palm. She sang about how much of a genius she was as she engraved a certain symbol on Riffâs chest. After she confirmed that she made no mistake in drawing the symbol, she cast a spell to prevent animals and bugs from approaching the body.
âGood. Perfect. Only good things have been happening today. Itâd be nice if something like this happened at least once a year, fuck.â
She beamed happily before then walking to the forest with a satisfied gait. Her appearance soon disappeared silently into the darkness of the forest.
âMii-n, min, minmin.
Only the sound of cicadas crying on the fir trees surrounding the corpse filled the air.
***
TL Note: Thanks for reading the chapter. Okay, thereâs a good chance Iâll slow down either this week or next week because of my midterm exams. Itâs sort of weird because we have to do them online, so Iâll probably have to actually look into the exam procedures more carefully to make sure I donât make any mistakes.
On another note, Iâve finished this âE-Rank Adventurer Partyâ section, so Iâll be going back to do another chapter of Handholding. This section was admittedly long and I feel bad for making the Handholding fans wait this long.