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Chapter 179 – 1992-2020
Xu RenDong didn’t know how he got home.
After the two changed their slippers at the door, Lian Qiao went to the kitchen to cook. Standing at the door of the kitchen, Xu RenDong looked at his busy back in front of the sink, hesitated for a long time and finally walked over and hugged him from behind.
“What’s the matter?” Lian Qiao seemed not surprised by the sudden intimacy. He turned back smiling and kissed him.
RenDong put him head on his shoulder, took a deep breath and said with difficulty: “Little Apple…”
Lian Qiao interrupted him: “I killed her.”
Xu RenDong was stunned. He didn’t expect Lian Qiao to admit it so readily.
Lian Qiao said this in a normal tone, as if he was stating what to eat tonight. He turned on the tap and rinsed a tomato under the warm running water. The tomatoes were large and round, with the plump luster of ripe fruit. Lian Qiao’s hands were clean and fair, in stark contrast to the bright red of the tomatoes.
It looked a little shocking.
RenDong didn’t know what to say for a while. Lian Qiao washed the tomato seriously, and said casually: “Sacrifice is always inevitable. As long as we can survive, what’s other people to us? If you feel guilty, just treat them as NPCs.”
“But—” RenDong bit his lips, “But Little Apple came to you that day to tell you that those people were going to harm you, how could you…”
“Little Apple is very strong. She has talent and strength. If she has murderous intentions towards you, it will be hard for me to guard against her.” Lian Qiao finished washing a tomato, put it on a clean plate aside and started washing the next one. His gaze was always on the tomato in his hand, as if he didn’t care about anything else, “Since this day will come sooner or later, it’s better to do it as soon as possible. As for why I wanted to destroy the corpse… I think you understand.”
Of course RenDong understands.
After Lian Qiao killed Little Apple, he deliberately dug out Little Apple’s neck, creating a bizarre and terrifying death. In this way, everyone will think that ghosts killed her. But Lian Qiao also took the initiative to express doubts and provoke suspicion among teammates. Anyway, no matter how everyone guessed, it was impossible for anyone to guess it was him.
—Because everyone has ghosts in their hearts.
Everyone thought that Little Apple was murdered after learning about the assassination plan. Therefore, everyone did not hesitate to identify Auntie Long-hair as the murderer and, because of this, internal strife broke into two factions. This also greatly reduced the pressure on Lian Qiao to break out of the trap set for him.
After all, who would have thought that Lian Qiao personally killed Little Apple who came to warn him?
RenDong opened his mouth but finally couldn’t speak anymore.
What Lian Qiao said was right, sacrifices are always inevitable. All the prompts of the instance point to one goal: which is to kill him in 2020. Although Little Apple was on good terms with them, but, at the moment of her own life and death, it’s hard to say she will remain on their side without reservations.
Lian Qiao killed Little Apple for him. He can’t blame Lian Qiao for this.
But……
But behaving in this way, isn’t it the same as Jiang Li?
Xu RenDong felt stiff all over and his tongue was numb.
He used to be bitter about Jiang Li’s repaying his kindness with that kind of ingratitude and, although he finally persuaded himself to look past it, he actually never approved of such behavior.
Life is important but he feels that some things are more important than living.
Like…humanity.
This is what he has always insisted on and what he has seen in Lian Qiao.
But now, he heard an extremely calm “I killed her” from Lian Qiao’s mouth. Lian Qiao actually admitted such a terrible thing so casually.
After meeting his roommate, he had already guessed the result. But Lian Qiao’s calmness and indifference still made him feel as if he had fallen into an ice cave.
Since when did Lian Qiao become a person like Jiang Li…
There was a familiar body temperature and a familiar smell from Lian Qiao but Xu RenDong felt that he was like holding a piece of ice.
Lian Qiao finally washed all the tomatoes. He looked down at Xu RenDong’s hands around his waist and the corner of his mouth pulled slightly, making a mocking smile.
“Can’t accept it?” Lian Qiao opened his fingers bit by bit and said in a cruel tone that was almost masochistic, “Are you afraid of me?”
These words pierced into RenDong’s heart like a sharp knife.
Along the way, he and Lian Qiao have experienced too much together. He thought that nothing could shake the relationship between them.
But how did it become like this?
Xu RenDong took a deep breath, facing the sharp pain in his heart and instead embraced him with all his body and mind. He said, “I’m not afraid of you. I love you.”
Lian Qiao smiled, as if he finally got a satisfactory answer. Then turned around and kissed him.
That kiss quickly progressed into something more substantial. The kitchen is not very convenient and Lian Qiao randomly pushed away the sundries on the dining table, and carried him to the table.
The dining table was cold and hard, which made RenDong’s body tremble. He suddenly had a very bad association. He felt that he was a prey being disemboweled. A beast named Lian Qiao buried his head in his stomach, gnawing at his internal organs and tearing at his soul.
While trembling, he heard Lian Qiao’s murmur-like whisper.
“No one in this world loves you more than me.”
“I can lose the bottom line of being a human being, but I can’t lose you.”
Those words wedged into RenDong’s soul and body like a sharp cone. He felt the severe pain of being pierced and torn but, amidst this pain, he felt a strange satisfaction.
He tasted the bloody joy and suddenly thought: that’s it.
If it is for you, I can also lose the bottom line of being a human being.
So be it.
…
Lian Qiao was like a hungry beast that couldn’t fill his stomach, constantly asking for it. RenDong couldn’t bear it, so he could only beg for mercy. But Lian Qiao didn’t let him go at all.
He was both physically and mentally pushed to the limit, and RenDong almost collapsed in the end. He screamed and wept, like a plump and juicy fruit being mercilessly squeezed to the last drop of juice.
Then he passed out.
It was already the next morning when he woke up again. His eyelids are hot and the sun is dancing on his face.
RenDong opened his eyes and the subtitle “2018” appeared out of nowhere. He didn’t care about the words but turned his head sideways, staring at the sleeping face of the person beside him.
Lian Qiao was still asleep and presumably exhausted. His breathing was steady and even, and the warm and moist breath patted on the tip of Xu RenDong’s nose, itching hotly.
RenDong found that he had slept on his arm all night. He was afraid that his arm would go numb, so he gently moved away.
He never thought that this rash act would wake up Lian Qiao.
Lian Qiao pressed him back into his arms almost instinctively. RenDong was caught off guard and bumped into his chest. The whole face was buried in his chest muscles and RenDong suddenly remembered that, in a certain reincarnation, when he was a baby, he was almost smothered to death by Lian Qiao’s chest muscles and couldn’t help laughing.
“Hmm…” Lian Qiao groggily woke up, still not knowing what he had done when he was half asleep. His eyes were foggy and his out-of-focus eyes looked around aimlessly, as if looking for something.
Soon, he found that his most precious person was in his arms. So he smiled slightly, lowered his head and kissed RenDong’s forehead.
“Good morning.”
RenDong raised his face and said good morning to him too.
The bed moved as Lian Qiao stood up and said, “Sleep a little longer, I’ll make breakfast.”
RenDong frowned, reaching out to pull him back. Lian Qiao was unprepared for him, and fell back into the bed all at once, opened his round eyes and looked at him puzzled.
RenDong coughed: “It’s better for you to rest, after all I… recovered.”
Although he was tortured to death last night, his body was replaced with a new one when the year changed. Although his body was sticky and uncomfortable, his physical strength had fully recovered.
Lian Qiao was different. His dark circles…it looks like he’s been fighting for half the night…
The more RenDong looked at it, the more ashamed he felt and immediately pushed him away, picking up a shirt with a flushed face.
With an extremely gentle smile on the corner of Lian Qiao’s mouth, he stretched out his hand to fasten the buttons for him. RenDong originally wanted to say that he didn’t need help but, when he met his eyes, he felt like he was going to drown in that tenderness.
When RenDong put on his clothes, Lian Qiao was still topless. He tilted his head, raised his head slightly and looked at Xu RenDong, looking like he was waiting to be fed, so well-behaved that it made people feel distressed.
RenDong’s heart softened and he reached out to ruffle his hair. Just as he was about to ask him what he wanted to eat, his gaze inadvertently swept across his neck and his heart skipped a beat.
It seems… not quite right.
RenDong was a little confused and involuntarily kept his eyes on Lian Qiao’s neck. Lian Qiao has a faint pink mark left on his left collarbone and neck, which was not a bad mark but looked like a ‘violin kiss’ which was the proof of Lian Qiao’s diligent violin practice. At the beginning, RenDong had a misunderstanding over it and had a big meal of vinegar.
…But no, that’s not quite right either.
RenDong frowned. Lian Qiao noticed his strangeness, blinked and asked him, “What are you looking at?”
RenDong’s eyes moved down slowly and landed on his smooth and bare chest. Then he asked hesitantly, “Where’s your key?”
“…” Lian Qiao’s pupils shrank slightly imperceptibly but still opened a pair of confused and innocent eyes, and asked blankly, “Huh?”
RenDong: “It’s the brass key with your name written on it. The one we got in the matryoshka  instance.” He tried to retrieve his memory and more details came to mind, “…Didn’t you find the key before entering the instance this time? You tied a rope and put the key on a string around your neck. I asked you if it would hurt you but you insisted that wearing it on your body felt safer…”
Lian Qiao laughed out loud.
Seeing him smile, RenDong felt inexplicably at ease. Sure enough, Lian Qiao stuck out his tongue and said with a smile: “You’re right, it’s a real pain. I wanted to persevere at first, but then my bones hurt from the pain. I ended up giving up on it.”
Before Xu RenDong could ask, “So where’s the key?” Lian Qiao pointed to the backpack in the corner and said, “The key is in the bag, in the interlayer on the left side of the zipper.”
Xu RenDong took out the key and put it in his hand to examine it carefully.
The brass key is simple in shape, with the word “Lian Qiao” engraved on it. Other than that, it seems to be nothing special. If he had to point out something special then the key was quite thick and, correspondingly, the keyhole of the lock it can open should be as thick as a finger.
RenDong stared at the key for a while, then sighed: “This is the last instance and I haven’t seen where it can be used…” He recalled the hint given by Shi JianChuan, “The key is used to unlock the lock”, so where the hell is the lock?
While Xu RenDong was staring at the key, Lian Qiao’s eyes were always glued to Xu RenDong’s body. But when RenDong put down the key and turned around, Lian Qiao quickly looked away.
“It’s engraved with my name…” Lian Qiao took the brass key from him, stroked the word “Lian Qiao” on it with his fingers and suddenly said abruptly, “If I use this key to play with you, wouldn’t it have some special feelings?”
“…?” Xu RenDong didn’t understand at first but, when he saw the smile in his eyes, RenDong came to his senses and was immediately ashamed and annoyed. He stammered angrily, “It’s such a time, why are you still unsatisfied? Your brain is full of…”
Lian Qiao: “So what if my brain is full of it?”
RenDong couldn’t speak. Gritting his teeth, he angrily went out to make breakfast.
What he didn’t know was that when he turned around, the smile on Lian Qiao’s face disappeared instantly.
His indifferent gaze slowly descended and landed on the brass key in his hand. Lian Qiao scraped the key vigorously with his fingernails, as if trying to dig out the word “Lian Qiao” from it.
T/N: I’m sorry if some readers cannot accept the ML’s actions, I do find it hard myself as well. Again talks about how realistic the author is when it comes to depicting the psychological torture and personality distortion someone really in a situation like this will undergo. All I can say is we are getting close to the end and there is a light at the end of the tunnel!