Stunned by the barrage of questions, Shi Jin glanced at the documents, glanced at Lian Junâs face, and tried to recall his thought process at the time. Finally, he replied weakly, âI forgot⊠I really didnât mean to hide it from youâŠâ
He truly forgot. That day, at first he was focused entirely on Chen Qingâs meeting with Lian Jun, then, because of Shi Weichongâs nonsense, he kept worrying if Lian Jun was angry. He didnât say anything about the list when giving a report because it slipped his mind. He didnât remember it until he was lying in bed in the evening.
The analysis of the information resulted in him getting a fever and not thinking clearly for several days. After he got better, the unpleasantness with Pockmarked Yuan had already been dismissed from his mindâhis attention turned to finding out whether Shi Weichong and Xu Chuan were colluding. He never considered telling Lian Jun about the customersâ list.
Long story short, he simply⊠forgot. Or rather, the thought that this was something he should inform Lian Jun about never even crossed his mind.
Lian Jun looked at his foolish, honest face and endured in silence for a while, but as it became obvious the teenager was not going to say anything more, he got angrier and angrier. âYou forgot? Thatâs your whole explanation?â
Facing his fury, Shi Jin gave a stiff nod.
Lian Jun moved his wheelchair wanting to leave, but after a meter, he suddenly stopped and looked at Shi Jin. He forced his voice to soften: âThe day you went to meet with Shi Weichong, you told me you needed to talk with him about a family matter. This âfamily matterâ was your suspicion you were on the Werewolfâs list of kidnapping targets?â
Shi Jin saw the other manâs face turned white with anger and felt a bit panicky. He grabbed the wheelchair armrest and nodded timidly. âYes.â
âFamily matter! Shi Jin, go back and think long and hard. When you understand, come see me.â Lian Jun threw off Shi Jinâs hand and left without turning back.
Bang! The door to the study slammed shut.
Frightened by Lian Junâs rare display of temper, Shi Jin stared at the door in shock.
A few seconds later, Gua Two cautiously pushed them open and sneaked in. He asked, lowering his voice, âHow did you manage to make Jun-shao this mad? He went straight to the underground floor.â
Shi Jin was somewhat confusedâhe didnât understand why this matter made Lian Jun so angry. He could only shake his head in distress and say, âI donât know⊠Um, why did Jun-shao go to the underground floor?â
âTo practice shooting. Every time Jun-shao gets angry, or is in a bad mood, he goes to the shooting range. Itâs his old habit,â Gua Two answered. Looking at Shi Jinâs befuddled expression, he let out a helpless sigh and asked, âWhat did you talk about with Jun-shao just now?â
Like a drowning man grasping at straws, Shi Jin picked the file and came up to Gua Two. Clutching onto him, he described the whole matter in a small voice, finishing, âI really forgot, but when I said this, Jun-shao was even angrier. He told me to think about it and come see him when I understand.â
After listening to his explanation, Gua Two said, frowning, âPerhaps itâs because you joined late and did not climb your way up from inside Annihilation, Shi Jin, but sometimes, you lack some knowledge that is simply common sense for us. Your mistake this time is that you broke the fundamental rule of the underworld: you concealed information. This is the biggest taboo in our line of work. You may say itâs not a big deal, this is your private matter, and you can take care of it by yourself, but you still shouldâve told Jun-shao. Otherwise, if you got in trouble one day because of this list, we would be left clueless and with no way to help you. Countless predecessors shed blood for this rule to formâif thereâs any indication you might be in danger, for any reason, you report it to higher-ups. This is both for your own good and for everyoneâs good, understand?â
Shi Jin hadnât really thought about it in this way; Gua Twoâs words cast the whole different light on the matter. He nodded. âI⊠Yeah, I think I understand.â
Seeing him truly listen, Gua Two was gratified. He continued, âBesides concealing information, you made another mistakeâyou looked for help from outsiders and did not tell Jun-shao.â
âI didnât look for help from outsiders, I just wanted to check my eldest brotherâs attitude,â Shi Jin protested.
âI believe it wasnât intentional. Jun-shao mustâve seen it too, or he wouldnât have run to the shooting range to vent his anger but thrown you out to be punished. Still, even though you didnât intend to seek outside help, thatâs how it looks like in other peopleâs eyes. In our world, when we are in danger or may encounter danger, the best way to deal with it is to report it to the organization instead of trying to take care of things by yourself. Looking for help from outsiders can potentially blow the matter up, needlessly complicating the situation. Well, this time you didnât screw up too muchâafter all, the person you involved was your brother. What you did wrong was not telling Jun-shao in advance⊠Anyway, Jun-shao saying you should think about it, then go find him is him giving you a chance. You shouldnât let it slip away.â After Gua Two finished, he contemplated Shi Jin for a moment, then sighed and left.
Shi Jin flopped down on the sofa and thumbed through the file again. âXiao Si, have I really done this the wrong way?â
Xiao Si consoled,
âIt has nothing to do with experience.â Shi Jin did a quick introspection. Recalling his thoughts and Gua Twoâs words, he let out a deep sigh. âI just⊠Didnât think about it.â
But if he considered Lian Jun a bit more, trusted him a little more, he would never forget to tell him about the customer list. In the final analysis, he simply neglected to do this. Although he cared about Lian Junâs safety and considered him a golden thigh to hug, he never entrusted his own safety to the other party.
Lian Jun had always regarded him as a subordinate who must be taken care of and protected, but he had never regarded Lian Jun as a boss he could rely on. This difference in their points of view was the real reason why he âforgotâ to tell Lian Jun about the list.
Xiao Si squirmed nervously, not knowing how to comfort him.
âLetâs go.â Shi Jin abruptly put the file away and stood.
Xiao Si stopped fretting.
âApologize,â Shi Jin answered, sighing. âYou know your Darlingâs physical condition. It takes a lot of energy to deal with the gun recoil. To top it off, when he left, he was so angry his face turned white; this is also harmful to his body. Iâm afraid he will do too much, and his health will suffer, which would mean my efforts these past few months would come to naught.â
Xiao Siâs heart turned cold, and it urged Shi Jin to hurry up.
By Lian Junâs order, the shooting range was emptied of people and closed off. Shi Jin was stopped in the reception room and could only wait in front of the door.
A few hours later, Lian Jun finally came out, looking as usual. His face returned to its habitual calm and had no trace of the previous fury.
Shi Jin rushed forward to block his way. âJun-shao, I understand what I did wrong.â
Lian Jun stopped the wheelchair and looked at him. His answer was succinct: âSpeak.â
Seeing he didnât refuse to talk, Shi Jin breathed a sigh of relief. He hurriedly said he shouldnât have concealed information and sought help from outsiders. Then he sincerely apologized and asked for punishment.
Lian Jun was silent for a while. As his finger slowly tapped on the wheelchair armrest, he asked, âDid Gua Two explain this to you?â
Shi Jinâs expression stiffened. He glanced at Lian Jun cautiously, then nodded. âBut I really understand. I will pay attention in the future, there will absolutely be no next time.â
Lian Jun was still watching him. âDo you have anything else to say?â
Shi Jin decided to take his chances and shook his head.
Lian Junâs face sank. He turned his wheelchair around to return to the shooting range.
âDonât! I still have something to say, donât go back there! Your face is already white!â Shi Jin held Lian Junâs wheelchair to stop him. He then daringly looked death in the eye and grabbed the other manâs right hand to inspect it. Seeing that sure enough, the palm was red, he couldnât stop himself from nagging. âYouâre angry, fine, but why would you torture yourself this way? Donât you know your health is poor? The gun recoil is hard to deal with, and youâve been practicing for so longâŠâ
âEnough!â Lian Jun pulled his hand back, saying cooly, âGo back and continue to reflect on your mistakes.â
âItâs time to eat. Iâll reflect after dinner.â Shi Jin did not let go of Lian Junâs wheelchair and pushed it towards the elevator regardless of its ownerâs opposition. He pressed the button for the sixth floor and said, âFirst, eat. You can skip soup today.â
Lian Junâs lips tightened. âDonât push your luck, Shi Jin,â he growled.
âIâm not, I just havenât finished explaining. Letâs talk as we eat.â Shi Jin, afraid he would continue to harm himself, calmed his voice and tried to soothe him. âItâs me youâre angry at, so why do this to yourself? Iâm pretty sturdy and my skin is thick, I can take abuse. If youâre mad at me, just say itâI donât think I can figure the reason by myself. You have to tell me what I should reflect on.â
Lian Jun turned his head away and refused to speak. He didnât even want to see Shi Jinâs reflection in the elevator mirror.
Shi Jin didnât keep on talking. He stooped down to help Lian Jun cover his legs with a blanket, then, when the elevator door opened, he pushed him out and continued to do so the whole way to the dining room. He also didnât forget to call the kitchen to let them know they didnât have to serve soup during todayâs dinner.
When they arrived, Shi Jin pushed Lian Jun to his usual place, but instead of returning to his own usual seat across the table, he sat next to him. As they waited for the dishes, he said sincerely, âDonât be angry anymore, I truly do know I was wrong.â
Lian Jun didnât look at him, but also didnât stop him from speaking.
Shi Jin sighed. He dragged his chair to sit beside Lian Jun, fixed his blanket, and said slowly, âI really didnât mean to hide this from you. The day I got back from the assignment, I got distracted by Chen Qingâs matter and my brothersâ nonsense, and Werewolfâs customer list slipped my mind. Later, when I remembered about it, I started to have a fever. I was groggy all the time and forgot about it again.â
Lian Jun still didnât speak, but his head turned slightly toward Shi Jin. Obviously, he was listening.
Shi Jin noticed and continued eagerly, âAs for my eldest brotherâitâs not that I was going to get outside help, I simply wanted to confirm if he was involved.â He described Xu Chuanâs position and his status as a family confidant at the time, his guess that it was Xu Chuan who wanted to harm him, and his suspicion that Shi Weichong and Xu Chuan mightâve collaborated. He explained things in great detail, but kept secret the matter of Xiao Si copying the information, only saying he deduced Xu Chuanâs name from some clues and conversations he eavesdropped on during the mission.
âYou know I used to suspect my eldest brother wanted to kill me. Even though our relationship got better after we solved some misunderstandings, I was afraid it was just my wishful thinking, so I wanted to test his attitude. My intention was to make sure my brother and Xu Chuan werenât working together, not to ask him for help behind your back.â
Lian Jun was finally willing to look at Shi Jin. Although his eyebrows were still drawn together in a frown, his voice softened a little. âIf so, why didnât you tell me then? Several days passed from when you recovered and went to meet with Shi Weichong to the officials contacting me. During that time, you had countless chances to tell me. Why didnât you?â
âIâŠâ Shi Jin looked at him. All kinds of excuses flashed through his mind, but when he met Lian Junâs eyes, the evasive words stuck in his throat. He hung his head, sighing. âBecause itâs a private matter and I didnât believe there was a need to say anything⊠I didnât think I should let you know.â
This was an ugly, unpleasant truth, dragged out of the depths of Shi Jinâs heartâinside, he wasnât willing to rely on Lian Jun at all. He was too used to being independent; in his subconscious, the idea that âyou can ask for help when youâre in troubleâ didnât exist.
Because of his position, it was always him who was helping others. He wasnât accustomed to seeking help from other people.
Perhaps this was something even Shi Jin wasnât aware of: he cared about Lian Jun, but didnât feel he needed him.
Lian Jun was by no means stupidâif anything, he was too sharp. As he looked at Shi Jinâs head hanging low, the stuffy feeling in his chest he had all afternoon slowly disappeared. His hands loosened their tight grip on the wheelchair armrests. A long moment later, he moved closer to the table and, coincidentally, away from Shi Jin. âEat,â he said.
Shi Jin raised his head and called out, falteringly, âJun-shaoâŠâ
âEat,â Lian Jun interrupted him and picked up his chopsticks. âIâll help you keep an eye on Xu Chuanâs matter, and you will find Gua Two to make up for the gaps in your knowledge. I donât want something like this happening a second time.â
Shi Jin glanced at his tranquil profile and opened his mouth wanting to speak, but he closed it again without a word.
He didnât know what else to say; everything was already made clear, and it was obvious Lian Jun intended to let bygones be bygones. Besides, it seemed that⊠the other man didnât want to listen to him any longer.
The mood throughout their dinner was subdued. Lian Jun looked as if he wasnât mad anymore. He listened to Shi Jinâs instructions during the meal and even asked about Xu Chuan in greater detail, apparently ready to help Shi Jin look into this matter. And yet, Shi Jin couldnât help but feel the atmosphere was strange. His heart somehow felt much heavier than when Lian Jun was visibly angry.
A few days later, thanks to Lian Junâs intervention, the investigation of Xu Chuanâs matter began to make rapid progress.
Shi Jin had no idea how Lian Jun did it, but he actually managed to pry open the mouths of Werewolfâs boss and his two deputies. From them, the investigators got the confirmation that the person who made a deal with Werewolf was indeed Xu Chuan, as well as his detailed requirements for the kidnapping.
Disfigurement, cut-off fingers, the victim was allowed to be killed but had to be tortured for a sufficient length of time firstâthese were Xu Chuanâs demands, vicious and cruel to the extreme.
After Xiang Aoting heard the testimonies, he was so furious he almost burst into the room where Xu Chuan was being held and beat him up. When he was stopped by the people around, his expression turned too frightening to look at.
With the confessions of Werewolf members in hand, the interrogators finally managed to force Xu Chuan to speak for the first time since he was arrested. The first sentence that came out from his mouth was, âI want to see Shi Weichong and Shi Jin.â
When Shi Weichong got the news about Xu Chuanâs request, he was going to refuse right away as he wasnât willing to let Shi Jin suffer the manâs malice. However, Shi Jin insisted on going, saying he wanted to talk to Xu Chuan face to face.
The brothers were locked in a stalemate until Lian Jun broke it by making a decision: Go. Since Shi Jin wants to go, let him.
Shi Weichong was angry, but had to compromiseâLian Jun had his own ways to let Shi Jin see Xu Chuan, so his objection was useless anyway. It was better to bring Shi Jin with him, at least then he could supervise their meeting.
When it was convenient for everyone, Shi Weichong drove to the club to take Shi Jin to see Xu Chuan.
Before going out, Shi Jin found Lian Jun and assured him the meeting shouldnât take too long, and he would definitely be back before dinner.
Lian Jun didnât look at him. In fact, he didnât bother to move his eyes away from the document he was reading. âCall Gua One if something happens,â was his only reply.
Shi Jin began to speak but bit his tongue. He turned away and left the study, feeling downcast.
For the past few days, he clearly felt Lian Junâs offhandedness and alienation. Although they still ate together and spent the day in each otherâs company, the number of their conversations dwindled to practically nothing. Also, Lian Junâs attitude became indifferent, much less lively than earlier.
As if this wasnât bad enough, Lian Jun became picky eater again, and his complexion looked increasingly worse. Day by day, he was losing what weight heâd gained in the past months.
âHahâŠâ Shi Jin sighed, extremely worried.
It was already the third time he sighed since getting into the car. Finally, Shi Weichong couldnât resist asking, âWhatâs the matter? Youâre eighteen but sigh more than an old man. Are you worried about the meeting with Xu Chuan?â
Shi Jin returned to himself and glanced at him, then shook his head. âNo⊠Iâm worried about Lian Jun. Heâs got too thin recently.â
Shi Weichongâs face turned black, and he stopped speaking. Though last time Shi Jin swore what he felt for Lian Jun was just worship, his current behavior was making people think otherwise.
It seemed Shi Jinâs conversation switch was flipped because he began to mutter: âI always feel Lian Jun is still angry, but he refuses to say anything so I have no idea what to do. He almost stopped eating too. He used to eat a few bites more when I urged him, but now he just leaves straight away when I say anything, as if heâd rather go hungry. He doesnât care about his body at all.â
As he listened to Shi Jinâs grumbles, Shi Weichong felt a choking sensation in his chest, making it hard to breathe. He blurted, âHeâs an adult, itâs his own business whether he eats or not. Why are you even worrying about this? Youâre living at his place to âstudy,â not to babysit him.â
âHow can I not worry? I took great pains to make him put on a little weight, one mouthful at a time. It wasnât easy at all.â Shi Jin was depressed. He collapsed in his seat, sighing for the fourth time, and mumbled, âIf only I could give him some of the flesh on my bodyâŠâ
The veins on Shi Weichongâs forehead swelled so much they looked close to bursting. He abruptly stepped on the brakes and pulled up on the roadside, then turned to stare at Shi Jin.
The teenager flinched, intimidated. âWhatâs wrong, Big Brother? Donât you get angry at me too, I wonât be able to deal with that,â he stammered out.
ââŠIt would serve you right!â Shi Weichong re-started the car. This conversation was making him angry, so he changed the subject: âWhat are your plans for New Yearâs Day? Itâs coming soon.â
New Yearâs Day?
Taken aback, Shi Jin glanced outside the carâs window. The entrances of some of the buildings were already decorated with red diamond-shaped FĂș characters and red lanternsâindeed, New Year was almost here. He couldnât help but sigh again; this year, he wouldnât be able to eat the dumplings with his family nor exchange the New Yearâs wishes and blessings with his colleagues.
Shi Weichong had a headache when he heard him sigh. He couldnât help but reach out and rap on the teenagerâs head.
âAh.â Shi Jinâs head knocked against the carâs window. He turned and scowled at Shi Weichong. âWhy did you hit me?â
âTo wake you up,â Shi Weichong snapped, but seeing Shi Jinâs aggrieved expression, he lost the will to scold him further. He simply stopped chatting with him lest his youngest brother aggravated him to death.
The place where Xu Chuan was being detained was relatively hiddenâit was a covert detention center, not known to the public. After all, not only was he a renowned lawyer but had ties with the criminal organization, Werewolf, and had to be handled carefully.
By the time Shi Weichong and Shi Jin arrived, Xiang Aoting was already there. He was talking to the police officers in charge of interrogating Xu Chuan.
âFourth Brother,â Shi Jin called out when he entered the room.
Xiang Aoting paused his conversation and came over to him. âAre you really sure you want to meet with Xu Chuan?â
Shi Jin nodded. âYeah. I want to know why he wanted to harm me.â
âBig Brother can ask him this for you.â Xiang Aoting disagreed with Shi Jinâs decision and urged him to think it over, but couldnât convince him to change his mind. Seeing his persuasion failed, he looked at Shi Weichong standing at the teenagerâs side.
âDonât worry, Iâll keep an eye on him,â Shi Weichong appeased.
Helpless, Xiang Aoting had no choice but to turn around and notify the police officers to let the two men into the interrogation room.
Xu Chuan heard the door opening but didnât move until Shi Weichong and Shi Jin sat on the other side of the table. Only then did he raise his head, as if he sensed something. Shi Weichong was sitting opposite him, so he saw him first, but it was obvious he wasnât interested in him. His eyes quickly moved away from him and rested on Shi Jin.
Then he froze.
Shi Jin looked at him as well. Carefully observing his expression, he seized the initiative and asked, âWhy do you want to kill me?â
The look on Xu Chuanâs face turned strange. He slowly straightened and leaned closer to Shi Jin, scrutinizing his appearance. He even stretched out his hands, trying to touch the young manâs face.
âWhat do you think youâre doing?!â Shi Weichong slapped his hands away.
It was as if Xu Chuan awoke from a dream. He glanced at Shi Weichong, then at Shi Jin, and suddenly laughed out loud. âRidiculous! You two sitting here amiably, like good brothers? What a great joke! I have nothing to say to you; the winner is the king, the loser is the villain. The person behind me is Xu Tianhua, the former deputy chairman of Ruixing. He had long seen Shi Xingrui as an eyesore. After learning he left all his shares to Shi Jin, he came up with the scheme to kill or maim him, then seize this opportunity to take control of Ruixing. But what a pity: he hadnât yet had the time to carry out his plans when you, Shi Weichong, popped up like a jack-in-the-box and blindsided him.â
Translatorâs Notes:
âWhat are your plans for New Yearâs Day?â â Shi Weichong is talking about Chinese New Year, which usually falls between 21 January and 20 February. Some fun facts here.
âDumplingsâ â in northern China, it is customary to make dumplings (jiaozi) after dinner to eat around midnight. Dumplings symbolize wealth because their shape resembles a Chinese sycee.