âHahahah, thank you for your cooperation. Itâs all for the safety of Area 47, so please donât think of it so badâŠ..â
Thunkâ
âUhâŠâŠâ
âWhat?â
âNo, itâs justâŠâŠâ
Ezel was at a loss for words for the sight he saw when the doors to the back of the truck opened.
There was an incredible amount of firearms and explosives stacked together, making this storage look much too small to contain all of it. The quality varied from average firearms Scavengers would use to top-quality items that are even rare to see in the Dome.
âYou just need to see the ones weâre selling, right? Iâm sorry, but if we need to show you even our own stuff, weâre basically revealing all of our cards. Iâm not that nice enough to let you do that.â
âT-Then youâre saying this isnât all of it?â
âHmm? Youâre saying that like youâre surprised. Itâs just one truckâs worth of items. These are the ones weâre going to sell with a discount to spread the word about us. This should be about enough to maintain our reputation. It looks like a lot, but itâs just because itâs packaged.â
You didnât even need to count to know that this was enough to arm at least three Raptor squads, but they were just going to sell it at a discount for promotion.
âAnd this isnât even all of it. This Metal Jaw person is very wary of me. Heâs trying to conceal any information that isnât mandatory, so this stuff is probably mostly for showâŠâŠ.â
But this was just too much to be considered a small display.
âArea 43âs spice merchant. Itâs no wonder he was able to spend all those years as a merchant with a reputation like that.â
Ezel looked closely at the man in order to engrave his face into his mind. His sharp eyes and the bottom half of his face being metal were probably the most distinctive features. But his face was oddly familiar.
âUhâŠ.â
âWhat? Is there a problem with my products?â
âNo, Iâll end the product inspection here. ButâŠ.. have we met before?â
Ezel was an inspector, and he usually split the people he remembered into two categories: people he remembered because he regularly saw them and people he needed to remember.
Since there was no way he regularly met the spice merchant of Area 43, the latter would apply to this familiar face, butâŠâŠ.
âI canât think of anyone who looks like this.â
Gyosu was looking at him with a dumbfounded expression. The old man was squeezing his eyes shut like he didnât want to see what was happening. AndâŠ
Crack, crrrack!
A large figure with an incredibly furious expression.
âHave. We. Met. BeforeâŠ.? Wowww, those Dome bastards really must have some skill, eh? They mustâve given you a few extra lives or something?â
âIan. Donât kill him. We need to live here.â
âI know. Of course, I do. Donât worry, Gyosu. Iâm completely calm and controlled right now.â
The man approached Ezel as he continued to say something he couldnât exactly understand.
Just then, Ezel realized what mistake he had made. The statement that he blurted out without much thought was taken in the very wrong direction.
âDonât.â
âOf course, I wonât.â
âI said donât.â
âHahahah. Oi, Gyosu. Canât you trust me? Havenât we been through enough together?â
âVex. Hold him back.â
Dash!
Click!
Just as Vex ran towards him, Ian took out a small gun from his jacket.
âAhhhh! Jaw! I said stop! Weâre actually going to be chased down by the Dome if we kill an Investigator!â
âLet me fucking go. That shitâŠ. That shit looks at me with his perverted eyes! Alright! Iâll live up to your expectations! Iâll shove these large, thick, and hard dynamites up all of your holes and make you feel like youâre in heaven!â
Bang!
âAghhhh! He really shot it!â
âInvestigator! Get down! Hold his arm back, damn it!â
âIâll kill you! How dare you insult me like this! Iâll pull out the spines of all of those Dome bastards with my own hands!!â
Bang!
âHepburn! Get his gun!â
âHeâs biting me! Why does he have such a strong jaw when he doesnât even have one?â
So after a long, chaotic fight, Ian calmed down after Ezel kneeled down on the floor and explained how the inspectors remembered peopleâs faces and how he had a very average sexual orientation, so what he said was a complete misunderstanding.
âHah, hah, hah.â
Ian, who was back in the cocooned rope state he was in this morning, continued to glare at the inspector with ferocious eyes.
âAhâŠ. Sorry about that. He has a short temper.â
âHagh, hah. Itâs fine. I was the one that caused the misunderstandingâŠ..â
Ezel actually lost his interest in the large man a long time ago. Instead, he paid more attention to the names he had heard in all of that ruckus.
âI-Iâm sure I heard it right. It was just once, but Gyosu called the old guy âVex,â and that guy called Gyosu âHepburn.ââ
Scribbleâ scribbleâ
Ezelâs pen danced over his notepad.
âHepburn. The name of the man who led their group to victory in the recent incident in Area 45. Hepburn, Ian, Vex. HâŠ..HIV. Itâs them. These are the guys who are called the Maniacs of Area 45!â
The underground bunker that was found in Area 45 a few days ago. The Dome and the Raptors had battled to take over that treasure chest full of old technology, and the ones that managed to survive in that hellish place full of mutants and scavengers, even when the Domeâs and Raptorâs elite forces met their end, were a mysterious three-person group called HIV.
A week had passed since that incident, and the Dome had gone around everywhere looking for information, but the forces that went into the bunker were completely wiped out.
The agents in Area 45 also got caught up with the Raptors and died, with Area 43 also in chaos, so there wasnât a single piece of information they were able to collect. Because of that, they needed to rely on the rumors floating around in the Community, and lost the timing to contact them, so the security key to the underground bunker that was suspected to have been taken by HIV was now up for auction on the Marketplace.
The group that everyone, including the Investigator and Executive Bureau and the City Council, has selected to be the number one recruitment target, with even a bounty on their heads, just settled down in Area 47 and were standing in front of his eyes.
âT-This is rare intel. The streamer âProfessorâ is the leader of HIV. Then it makes sense why heâs trying to expand his forces. He must be filthy rich now. And especially that key, the security key, is making the record auction price in the Marketplace as we speak.â
âMr. Inspector.â
âWowâŠ.. I never thought that this wouldâŠ.. Gyosu isâŠ.â
âMr. Inspector?â
âYes? Ah, yes! W-What is it, Mr. Gyosu?â
Ezel jumped back into reality at Gyosuâs call. He was acting completely different from his previous relaxed attitude. It was only natural. If the Gyosu in front of him was that âHepburn,â then he was rumored to be an expert in combat that not even the newest model Exosuit could handle.
He didnât have any information about his fighting method or strength, but they were able to make it through the forces of mutants, the Dome, and the Raptor all combined, and even with valuables at that, so he didnât need any special information to know that the man standing before him was unbelievably powerful.
As Gyosu looked at the suddenly alert Ezel with concerned eyes, he spoke in a comforting tone.
âIt seems that today has become a bit uncomfortable because of someâŠ.. reasons. If you need any other information, you could personally contact me. You know my nickname. What would your nickname be, Mr. Investigator? I need it in order to contact you. I understand that you wonât reveal your name for security reasons, but itâs okay to reveal the name you use in the Community, right?â
âUhâŠ.uh?â
âWait. My ID?â
. . . .
Click, click. Ding!
â[Soygaybar]â
âGod damn it!!!!â
At that moment, Ezel realized that the political stance of the Dome was not what he should be worried about right now. Soygaybar. My nickname. All of the things he had done behind that anonymous name!
âHah, Iâm feeling real shitty all of a sudden. Do I look like a joke to you? Huh?â
âTrait 6: [Weak Mentality]â
âLMAOOOOO Heâs dying.â
N-No. My past self, what have you doneâŠ.?!
All of the bullshit that Gyosu had gone through in the game passed through like a flashback. The cause of that hell was me. The one that made the boss of the manic group HIV roll around like a dog was me!
âI-Iâll definitely die. Iâm going to die if I get caughtâŠ..!â
Gyosuâs message, saying âIâm going to nuke your shelter,â rang inside Ezelâs head.
He wanted to keep calm, but sweat was already pouring like rain down his face and back.
âAre you hot, Mr. Inspector? Why are you sweating so much?â
âAh, i-itâs nothing! I-I just sweat a lot!â
âOh, I see. Oh, right, you still have blood all over you. Do you want to take a shower? Our shelter is small, but it still has everything you needâŠ..â
âI actually also have hydrophobia! IâmâŠIâm scared of water!â
âIâŠ..see?â
âOh God, Jesus, Bhudda, Confucius! Please donât let me get caught! Please!â
As he saw wrinkles slowly appear on Gyosuâs face, Ezel prayed to every single spiritual being he knew of.
âO-Of course! Since there is no problem with the inspection results, Iâll be going back now!â
ââŠ..Okay. Then your nicknameââ
âIâllbeonmywaythen!â
Ezel tried his best to pretend like he didnât hear Gyosuâs final call and turned around. Act natural. Please act natural! Damn it, why is my body stiffening up? And why is my breathing so unnatural? Not even a horny pig breathes like this!
And with his extreme efforts, he could hear himself getting closer to the staticky sound of the protection field. Just a little more, just a little more, and Iâm at the suitâŠ.
ââŠâŠStop right there.â
âAh.â
â [email protected] #%^%@#!!!â
Right before he got to his destination, the sharp voice that commanded him from behind let Ezel know. Gyosu figured out something.
As Ezel turned around slowly like a character in a horror movie, Gyosu was standing with his hands in his pockets and his head slightly cocked to the side, staring at him intently.
âMr. investigatorâŠ. That reminds me, you told me that you enjoyed my streams. And I noticed that you started to become a little nervous ever since Vex accidentally called me âHepburn.ââ
âUhh, uhhhhhhâŠ.. thatâsâŠ.â
Thump thump thump thump thump!
Ezel hurriedly stuck his hand into his pocket. Emergency signal, whereâs the emergency signalâŠ..?!!
âWe honestly moved thinking that you already knew that fact, but now that I think about it, seeing that the Area 45 scavengers attacked us, the news is probably still only inside Area 43. So naturally, the Dome knew the Spice Merchant had entered our Big Dream Caravan but didnât know that weâre the infamous HIV.â
Thunk.
Ezel, who was still rummaging through his pockets, remembered that he had left the emergency signal inside the Exosuit. It was like life was being sucked out of him.
âSo it makes sense why our Mr. Investigator here is so eager to go backâŠ. But why hide your nickname? Like you did something wrong? Hmm? Donât you think so? My precious viewer?â
Clump, clump, clump.
Pat.
Gyosu, who stopped behind Ezel, still frozen in the position of heading out of the shelter, placed his arm on his shoulder and asked with the smile of a devil about to steal an innocent soul. Gyosu was absolutely certain.
âWho are you?â
âEeeeeeep!â
To that question, Ezel could not do anything other than let out a terrified moan.
Ten minutes later, the ropes that were restraining Ian were reused to restrict Ezelâs body.
âOhh.â
Flinch!
âOhooooooooo~â
Flinch! Flinch!
Every time Gyosu let out an exclamation, Ezel, who was tied and sitting on the sofa, flinched like he was being pricked by a needle.
âWhy are you so scared? We didnât know each other for just a day or two, didnât we? Just call me like you usually do. Prof~ Prof you bastard~ Hey you shit~. Donât you think so? Soybar, my friend?â
âN-N-N-No sir! I-Iâm perfectly fine calling you sir, Gyosu sir!â
Gyosu smirked as he looked at Soygaybar, all frozen up. He reeeally wanted to meet this guy at some point. He knew that he was rich and lived in the Dome, but he was an Investigator. And even one with access to an Exosuit.
âSoygaybarâŠ. What an interesting name. So you were looking at me with those kinds of eyes after all.â
Ezel looked back to see Ian, who was tossing a stick of dynamite in the air like a baseball, and replied in a panic.
âItâs not like that at all! I really just thought I saw you before! Really!â
âOh, is that so? Why donât you look closer, then? Have you really never seen this face before?â
âN-No! I havenât!â
As Ian leaned in closer with a lighter flickering in his hands, Ezel again replied, jittering in fear.
Ian, looking satisfied with Ezelâs attitude, laughed and returned to his place.
âDonât scare him too much, Ian. Heâs still an investigator from Dome. Not to mention, heâs the one that basically saved my life.â
âAhh. Right. You said that this was the guy who started your concept Letâs Play.â
âR-Right! If it wasnât for me, Gyosu wouldnât have had the money and fuel to use his generator and wouldnât have been able to make the character thatâs making him a livââ
Schrrrrkâ Shrrrrrrkâ
Vex was sitting on the floor, sharpening his knife. He had a glint in his eye as he checked the blade of the knife.
âThenâŠ.. the one that caused a time bomb to get planted in Hepburnâs head. Youâre the oneâŠ..â
Gulp.
Ahh, damn it. No wonder they said he was going to die because of his blabbering mouth.
âOh, right. Thatâs true. Oi, Hyde. Say hi. This is your godfather.â
[Oh, godfather! Hallo!]
Ezel paled as he looked at Gyosuâs squirming fingers, then at the glamming kukri that was in his other hand.
âSoygaybar. No, Ezel. As you know, you need a fair give and take in the Wasteland, right? I think we have quite a lot of debt between us two, donât you think? Why donât we use this chance toâŠ.. repay those debts?â
âH-Hey, GyosuâŠ. Gyosu, sir! Wait! Wait!!!â
âI wonât kill you. And from my experience, people donât really die of shock from getting one of their hands or feet cut off. You can believe me on that one. Thanks to someone, I started a game called GG with a very fragile trait, so I lost count of how many times my limbs got severed. I can proudly call myself an expert.â
Thumpthumpthump- thumpthumpthumpthump!
Ezel squeezed his eyes shut after seeing Gyosuâs shining smile.
âIâve had a lot of fun with you for the last five years. Soybar.â
Shlink!
Without any time to stop him, the kukri in Gyosuâs hand sliced downward.
Tdâdâdâdâkâ
The only thing that the sharp blade cut through was the rope tying Ezel up. After roughly sheathing the kukri, he playfully tapped on Ezelâs shoulder.
âHeheheheh. You scared? You were the cause of my anxiety for the past few days, so this is my paybaâ.â
Thudâ
ââŠ.Soybar? Ezel?â
âHeâs knocked out?â
Ian and Vexâs dumb grins turned into concern when Gyosu swung the sword.
âHey, shortie. This guyâs an Investigator. What happens if he doesnât wake up and canât return back to headquarters?â
âWhat do you mean âwhat?â The Domeâs special ops are going to charge into the last place he was seen!â
âŠ..Oh, shoot.
Gyosu approached the unconscious Ezel and tried to slap and shake him awake.
âHey, Soybar. Wake up.â
Slap slap.
âSoybar! Sorry if the joke went too far! Just wake up!â
Slap! Slap!
No matter how hard Gyosu slapped him, Ezel just shook in his hands like a doll.
âItâs no use! Heâs out cold!â
âWater! Get water! Weâre all dead meat if he doesnât wake up!â
âDamn it! Gyosu Park, you idiot! You canât take jokes this far!â
âI wouldnât have if I knew this would happen!â
So then, another round of ruckus rampaged through Gyosuâs shelter in order to wake Ezel back up.
It was five hours later when Ezel opened his eyes again when the Exosuit he came in was ringing like crazy.