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He was Divorced\n
Xie Qingcheng didnât seem to plan on saying anything more to He Yu; he just asked, âXie Xue didnât tell you?â\n
âNo.â\n
âThen she probably thought this was my personal affair.â\n
He Yu was quiet for a moment. âWere you and Li Ruoqiu not suitable?â \n
Li Ruoqiu was the name of Xie Qingchengâs ex-wife.\n
He Yu had a deep impression of the woman whoâd tied the knot with Xie Qingcheng â he thought there was something wrong with her. How could she enter the tomb of marriage with such a cold and emotionally slow guy like Xie Qingcheng?\n
In his memory, Xie Qingcheng always appeared to have no appetite or desire. He should just wear a neat and proper white coat behind an office desk, with a voluminous bookshelf behind him, and the scent of cold, sober medicine on his body.\n
He Yu found it hard to believe Xie Qingcheng would love a person, and even harder to believe any person would love Xie Qingcheng.\n
But Dr Xie did indeed get married.\n
He could still remember the wedding day. Heâd followed his motherâs request to send a gift and arrived very casually; he hadnât even changed out of his school uniform. When the driver dropped him off at the hotel, He Yu stepped in wearing his white sneakers, his school bag slung over one shoulder, and his hands in the pocket of his school track pants.\n
Xie Qingcheng was there welcoming the guests.\n
The wedding team had adorned him with makeup. He was standing in the crowd, his posture straight and his bearing dignified. Stars seemed to have fallen on his dark brows. The MC said something to him, but the surroundings were too noisy and Xie Qingcheng was too tall. Unable to hear, he tilted his head and leaned over so the MC could speak close to his ear. Set off by the contrast, that face became an eye-catching, stunning pure-white, like thin porcelain illuminated by a spotlight, one that could break by even the slightest touch. His lips were also light in colour, like blood frozen beneath ice.\n
His skin was like a world of glass, his lips like frosted red plums.\n
Although He Yu did not like men, he knew when to appreciate art.\n
At that moment, he felt that although Li Ruoqiu was also very good-looking, frankly, the proposal scene between her and Xie Qingcheng may have looked like this-\n
Xie Qingcheng mustâve been dressed in a white coat, the usual ballpoint and fountain pen pinned to it, and had his hands in his pockets as he stood tall like an unreachable flower. Then, he wouldâve used an irritating tone to tell the lady:\n
âI want to marry you. Kneel down in gratitude.â\n
Of course, he was very good at pretending, so he wouldnât tell the truth.\n
With his bag over one shoulder, He Yu walked up with a smile and stood before the handsome groom and the beautiful bride. âDr Xie. Sister-in-law.â\n
Li Ruoqiu: âThis isâŠ?â\n
Xie Qingcheng introduced him to his wife. âA friendâs son.â\n
He made an agreement with the He family that he wouldnât tell others He Yu was a patient.\n
Li Ruoqiu praised him. âHow beautiful; what a good-looking child.â\n
He Yu bowed politely like a gentleman. With smiling dark eyes, he said, âNo, sister-in-law is the one as fair as a flower and as beautiful as the moon.â\n
As he spoke, the youth took a thick, sealed red envelope from his canvas schoolbag, and gently said, âI wish you and Dr Xie eternal love.â\n
Bullshit. \n
At that time, heâd already felt nobody could endure a man like Xie Qingcheng, but he didnât expect the marriage to end so quickly. Now it seemed he had the ability to command the (1) spirit of language?\n
He Yu restrained his rejoice and calmly asked, âWhy did you guys split?â\n
Xie Qingcheng remained silent.\n
âI remember she was very fond of you. She came to my house after the marriage. At that time, she had nobody but you in her eyes.â\n
âHe Yu, this is indeed my private affair.â\n
He Yu slightly raised his eyebrows.\n
He observed Xie Qingchengâs arrogant figure. He suddenly felt, after so many years abroad, many things have changed.\n
Only, he wasnât curious about Xie Qingchengâs changes, so in the end, he smiled. âForget it then. Good luck on your blind date.â\n
Xie Qingcheng lightly glanced at him. Without even a word of thanks, he turned around and left.\n
The dormitory door closed behind him.\n
Because He Yu mentioned his ex-wife, Xie Qingcheng couldnât help but recall the extreme failure of a marriage he had with Li Ruoqiu on the road. \n
Xie Qingcheng knew why Xie Xue didnât mention it to He Yu.\n
Because the reason for their divorce was a bitter pill to swallow â Li Ruoqiu did love him, but she also stopped loving him later.\n
She had an affair.\n
This was unacceptable to Xie Qingcheng. Although he couldnât understand love, he knew of familial responsibility, and his beliefs were still very conservative in many aspects. \n
But she was different.\n
She believed the most important thing in marriage was love, not responsibility, so they ended up divorcing. She fell in love with a married man. After the incident, she weepingly accused him of only considering his work and that marrying him was no different from marrying a cold schedule.\n
Such accusations werenât unreasonable; Xie Qingcheng knew he was an unsentimental person.\n
In this relationship, Xie Qingcheng never actually felt any love. She chased him for many years before he later felt it quite suitable. After a period of interaction, they got married.\n
After their marriage, as the husband, he didnât evade his responsibilities or obligations.\n
But that wasnât the kind of marriage she wanted.\n
Xie Qingcheng was very responsible, but he wasnât romantic and had a cold personality. He could even maintain indifference and rationality between the sheets, without sinking into depravity nor into obsession, as if he was just completing a necessary duty for a family he wasnât even committed to. \n
Hence, her heart gradually cooled.\n
She cheated but turned around saying, âXie Qingcheng, you have no heart. Even now you still donât understand what I want is love, not just a marriage. â\n
But what is love?\n
Xie Qingcheng could only feel a splitting headache. He didnât know how much effort it took to keep himself from slamming the table with fury. At that time, he looked at her â he looked for a long time â before he finally spoke numbly, his voice as tranquil as stagnant water: âDoes that man like you? He has a wife and daughter. How sincere do you think he is to you?â\n
When these questions were asked, she raised her head with something Xie Qingcheng simply couldnât understand burning in her eyes. \n
ââŠI donât care if he has a wife and children. All I know is when he embraces me, at least itâs warm. I can hear his heart racing. Heâs not like you, Xie Qingcheng. Youâre clean, you never womanised, and you gave me your money and your home. However, your heart beats for me like a dead manâs ECG. Weâve been married for so many years, yet it always remained a straight line.\n
We only have a few decades in our lifetime. He was once bound by his own unfortunate marriage; so am I. Iâve thought it through. I donât need status, wealth, or reputation. No matter how others call me a slut or a loose woman, I only want to be with him.â\n
Xie Qingcheng closed his eyes, the cigarette in his hand almost burning his fingertips. âLi Ruoqiu, are you crazy? There is no love in this world. Love is just a reaction produced by the dopamines in our body; mischief caused by our hormones. But there exists responsibility and family. Youâve gone crazy wanting to be with him, but is he willing to divorce and live with you?â\n
Silence.\n
Then, the flame in Li Ruoqiuâs eyes burned brighter and crazier. Finally, with unshed tears but unmoving stubbornness, she said, âI just donât want to feel regret.\n
Xie Qingcheng, there is love in this world. It may be treacherous and contrary to human relations. It may be dirt-cheap and unbearably filthy. But it exists and has nothing to do with hormones and dopamine.\n
Iâm sorry. I canât live with you anymore, because now I know what love is. I love him, even if itâs wrong.â\n
After so many years of divorce, Xie Qingcheng still felt it ridiculous when thinking of this conversation.\n
If this so-called âloveâ allows people to bruise themselves even when they know itâs wrong and have them obstinately persist in their foolish ways by committing infamy and spurning morality, life, and their bottom lines even though itâs obvious this road is only an endless, yawning chasm⊠For them to ignore everything⊠Then he was afraid this wasnât love, but a disease.\n
He couldnât empathise with it.\n
Although he had a stubborn character, he was, after all, a straight man who favoured male chauvinism. Having his wife cheat and run away with a married man still hurt him in the end.\n
For some time after the divorce, Xie Qingcheng still worked, wrote papers, and taught students; there were no signs of suffering. But everyone around him could see he was rapidly losing weight, his cheeks were slightly sunken, and his voice carried slight hoarseness when he spoke.\n
The director, concerned that âif he hangs himself, the school will be trending onlineâ, inquired about his well-being. âProfessor Xie, if youâre not feeling well, please take a leave of absence and rest at home for a little while. You mustnât force yourself.â\n
Who wouldâve thought Xie Qingcheng would fling a stack of compressed ppt folders containing the latest teaching courseware at him? With meticulously written content and a concise system, the director knew even if their mind was at its clearest and their body was at its most vigorous, itâd be difficult to complete this project within such a short time period.\n
âDo you still want me to leave?â Xie Qingcheng leaned back in his office chair, folding his slender fingers. He was so thin he was like a paper cutout; so slim he was like a curl of smoke. His eyes were clear when raised to look at people, perhaps even cold and sharp.\n
âI do want to rest, but please check whether anyone other than me can prepare the coursewareâs first lecture like this.â\n
Naturally, nobody could.\n
From his torch-like eyes, the director could also see that their school wouldnât be trending on the news anytime soon â these werenât the eyes of a dying person.\n
But almost nobody knew that in order to work well, in order to bury his scattered emotions to the bottom of his heart, Xie Qingcheng would sit in a room and smoke as soon as he returned home. Heâd smoke until he was in a painful coughing fit, unwilling to stop even then; heâd smoke until his lungs almost fumigated to black and the whole house turned into a nicotine paradise.\n
When he looked like this, Auntie Li from the neighbouring house would feel extremely terrible.\n
The Xie family was originally very well-off. His parents were both very high-ranking superintendents, but during a case, they made a major mistake and were both demoted to the lowest rank. At that time, Mother Xie became ill again. In order to give her medical treatment, they sold their big house and moved to a humble alley in an old district at Huzhou. They lived in poverty but became acquainted with many warm-hearted neighbours.\n
When Xie Qingchengâs parents died, Xie Qingcheng was not yet an adult and had to take up the responsibility of becoming the head of the family. The neighbours looked after the poor children and took good care of them, and among these people, Auntie Li treated Xie Qingcheng the best.\n
Auntie Li was a little younger than Xie Qingchengâs mother and loved children, but never married and had no children of her own. She almost regarded the Xie familyâs siblings as her own treasure, especially after the death of their father and mother, the duckweed-like woman and the two abandoned children made some unforgettable emotions in each other.\n
When Xie Qingcheng divorced, Auntie Li washed her face with tears for a long time, and then, like a broken-hearted old mother, cheered up and tried to introduce him to a girl.\n
He, too, in order not to hurt Auntie Liâs feelings, went to these dates, but he actually just went through the motions, and for those girls, he was not a very good choice-\n
When Xie Qingcheng got married for the first time, the conditions were very good. He was handsome and tall, a doctor in a third-class hospital, in his twenties, in his prime and with a bright future.\n
The only hardware flaw was that he came from a poor background and had no money.\n
Now, however, he would be on his second marriage â his salary as a university professor was not as high as when he was a doctor and he was no longer so young, so his flaws became an unusually craggy septum. He was a divorced man almost in his forties who had no good house nor car, and an unwed sister who needed his care like a child from a preceding marriage. \n
No matter how handsome his face was, he wasnât an idol; it couldnât be exchanged for money to survive.\n
How could any ladyâs parents not mind?\n
Blind dating was different from being in love. Itâs said the first thing one judges is appearance, but it was, in fact, the otherâs general condition. Hence, the conversation often occurred like this:\n
âYour job is good, right? Can you take care of a family?â\n
âNo. Because Iâm a medical school professor, the contents for my lecture notes need to be meticulous without mistakes and students often have many issues. I often work overtime.â\n
âOh⊠But, you have a good income, right?â\n
âIt may take another three years of teaching or so to get a promotion. But Iâm not sure if Iâll still be at the university after three years.â\n
âAh⊠Do you have any other close relatives?â\n
ââŠI have a sister.â\n
âIs she married?â\n
âNot yet.â\n
âŠâŠ\n
The stabs were often sharp and straightforward and the knife dissected the personâs condition, and the smiles the other party at first still had at the beginning was cut cleanly.\n
After Auntie Li found out, she was very anxious: âAi, you have to boat during a blind date! This is a customary convention. Others would brag, but you go and speak about yourself in the worst ways. Now, people will think Iâm bluffing â who wouldâve thought youâd get it all wrong?!â\n
Xie Qingcheng originally wanted to say, âI donât want to get married anymore.â\n
But looking at Auntie Lie, who was so anxious she held sadness in her eyes, his words changed to, ââŠItâs become a habit. Iâm sorry.â\n
Auntie Li stared at him and choked up: âYouâre such a good child, but why doesnât Buddha bless youâŠ? I burn incense and pray every day just so I can beg God to give my familyâs treasure a good marriage. Then, itâll be worth it even if I die immediatelyâŠâ\n
âAuntie Li, donât talk nonsense.â\n
âWhat am I afraid of at such an old age? Youâre different â youâre still young. If you donât have a good life in the future and Iâve gone under, how can I face your father and MuyingâŠâ\n
Auntie Li insisted on finding him all kinds of girls, always hoping to set up a marriage.\n
Xie Qingcheng felt very uncomfortable. He was an arrogant, tough man who refused to lie and was unwilling to be criticized. Moreover, for some reason, his thoughts were completely different from during his blind date with Li Ruoqiu. He was quite sure that he would not spend the rest of his life with anyone.\n
But with his character as the man in charge of the family, how could he stand to have his friends and family grieve and shed tears for him? He can only accept that they are living happily under his protection and care.\n
So even if the outcome was predictable, he would agree to go to those job application-like blind dates in order to make Auntie Li happier.\n
.\n
His current blind date was with a young lady called Bai Jing. She had a relative teaching at the university; it was said they graduated from a renowned medical school. She herself worked as a counter lady at the luxury counter in the most fashionable mall in Huzhou.\n
In the golden coastal cities, there was no shortage of billionaire financiers. Girls spent their days at the high luxury counters all day long. As they listened to the exuberant talk of male and female customers, they could not help but have the illusion that they are also very noble and high-end. They looked at people who had their heads held high, took a look at the logo of their clothes, and stamped all the boys who wore Adidas and Nike as poor in their hearts. They needed at least a set of Prada to deserve even talking to her.\n
When Xie Qingcheng arrived at the cafe, Bai Jing was on the phone with her bosom friend: âAiya, exactly! You donât even know â I encounter those kinds of idiots at work every day. Today came a mother-son pair, and the son was wearing who-knows-what. Iâm guessing itâs from (2) Taobao. If it wasnât for my excellent professionalism, my eyes would have rolled up to the sky. Ai, wearing Taobao products to browse our sales counter, are you joking?â\n
Her pedicured pinky raised as she stirred the coffee in her small cup. Bai Jing listened to her best friend reply a few words on the other end of the call and covered her mouth as she laughed.\n
âThen what can they buy? They obviously canât afford anything. Even a pair of slippers from our sales counter might be worth half their salary. Ai, babe, let me tell you, do you know what that boy came up to me and said? He asked, âDo you sell baseball caps here? My mother likes to work out. Itâs her birthday. I want to buy her a baseball cap.ââ\n
Bai Jing laughed, quivering like a flowering branch. \n
âI directly told him, âIâm sorry, our brand has never produced a baseball cap before. Sir, donât you know our brand?â Hahaha, you shouldâve seen his face! It was spectacular . . . Aiya, wait, the man I have a blind date with seems to have arrived. Iâll stop chatting with you first. Letâs clock out of Bulgari for afternoon tea later, okay, babe? I love you! Mua! â\n
Itâs a pity the cafe was noisy and Xie Qingcheng was looking for someone, so he didnât hear her talk.\n
Bai Jing saw him looking around, and in line with the matchmakerâs description of âvery tall, very handsome, peach blossom eyes, but a very cold temperamentâ image, immediately waved at him: âHi! Are you Professor Xie Qingcheng?â\n
Xie Qingcheng walked over: âYes. Hello.â\n
Bai Jing sized him up before finally locking his eyes on the simple T-shirt. She suddenly beamed with pleasure and her coy voice went an octave higher. âHello, hello, my name is Bai Jing.â\n
(1) Spirit of Language â a Japanese belief that there is divine power in language that brings positivity to positive words and negativity to negative words, which can be used to impact a personâs life. \n
(2) Taobao â a very popular online store in China that sells products at a very cheap price. They do international shipping, so if you can understand Chinese this translator highly recommends it (ââżâżâ)(ââżâżâ)\n
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Note: The dialect â(*)You check funny no funnyâ means âyou said itâs funny, but itâs not funny. This dialect was translated into âare you joking?â when Bai Jing was talking about the son who supposedly wore Taobao clothing to the store she worked atâ\n
Ah, a man like Brother Xie was made for being fucked by boys. Not only are his legs very man, his coiling waist is also very pretty; not only are his hands manly, theyâre pretty when scratching anotherâs back. What blind date? Go get fucked, go get fucked, slurp slurp.\n
Mini Theatre:Â \n
Character Card~\n
Xie Qingcheng\n
Sex: Male\n
Age: 32\n
Height: 180cm \n
Occupation: Doctor, Professor of Medical Science \n
Favorite Dish: None; anything that can be eaten\n
Least Favourite Dish: None, as long as it isnât spoiled\n
Favorite Colour: None. \n
Least Favorite Color: Flamboyant color combinations\n
Favorite Animal: Dog\n
Least Favourite Animal: Idiots\n
Any current unlovable partners? No. \n
Anecdote:Â \n
When Xie Qingcheng took office in a hospital, one time he came back from a ward check and saw the coffee cup on his desk had been moved. Placed underneath was a piece of paper that wrote, âDoctor, are you (**)1?â He didnât know what 1 meant, so he casually asked a trainee in the same unit as him and received the otherâs subtle gaze. After understanding the implication, Xie Qingcheng securely wore his mask for several consecutive months when treating outpatients. Later, he was confessed to by a fair-skinned and long-legged male orthopedic surgeon, who bashfully and tenderly asked if he was a 1. That was the first time he felt such a shocking âgay men are by my sideâ. Xie Qingcheng is conservative, rigid, and overly-straight, to the point where heâd become a straight male cancer. As a doctor, although he knew homosexuality was a natural phenomenon, as an individual, heâd always been unable to accept this group. He further disliked those youthful pretty boys.  \n
He Yu: âŠIs the last sentence about me? \n
(*) You â this is a Wu dialect\n
(**) 1 â â0â refers to âshouâ and â1â refers to âgongâ\n
<hr class="wp-block-separator has-text-color has-background has-black-background-color has-black-color is-style-wide">\nïŸ(âąâĄâą)ïŸ Please note that this is a translation that stemmed from interest and is a hobby. There are other ones out there made by more experienced translators so if you find mistakes do let us know. Note that this chapter still needs a polish and nuances corrected â it will be finished tonight. UPDATE: This chapter has been edited!\n
Find the translators: Mushi @mushixx_ and .sienz @znies_ and the editor: Argenti @ziliujinvitae\n