chapter 27

The hinges of the rusty door made an irritating sound. Being used to it, Jude kicked the door half-heartedly and closed it. A pale fluorescent light, like a dead fish eye, lit the room slightly. An envelope containing some food recipe was thrown carelessly over the sofa, and the blond detective settled on the sofa.

After watching a baseball game with Jude yesterday, Tim, who slept comfortably in the squalid house, did not say he would come to Jude’s house today seeing that things had been resolved. Jude was told to eat properly, and was given a paper with a simple recipe when it was printed. And seeing Jeffrey come back and say, “Did you have something to say?” Tim seemed to have somehow found his backbone inside him.

Recalling what he said to Tim last night, Jude looked down for a moment. Memories before ten years old. First scene. A girl caught by a robber. Alvin Jones. It was Alvin Jones after all. There was no reason to be interested in Jude’s life if it wasn’t him.

Annoying. For once, the tongue-tied Jude stretched out over the sofa. Even though it was changed not long ago, the still precarious fluorescent light pierced the closed eyelids and stimulated his nerves.

“…….you’ve been talking nonsense…..”

A murmuring voice leaked out. Jeffrey Dowman. I thought he had a pretty good sense of smell, but I didn’t know he’d say that to Tim. He brought up such an extremely personal matter he could really be in trouble for privacy. Did he think Tim was not straight enough to be honest?

-That before ten years old, that you don’t remember…..can I ask?

Haa. Jude took a breather toward the ceiling. He wanted to say no. At the beginning of the memory, it wasn’t very pleasant. It’s obviously not a happy thing to walk on a cold winter day, dressed in rags and wobbling through the streets with no memory. Whether there were shoes or not, the soles of his feet hurt as if they were frozen.

A little dazed at the past, the phone rang. There weren’t many people who could call Jude’s house. Tim or Chief or maybe – Jude picked up the wireless phone, hoping to for either the two ahead as much as possible – no, certainly Tim.

[-It’s me.]

Since when did I get used to his voice so much that I could recognize him just with the word ‘me’? Clicking the tongue in his mouth, Jude answered in a sleepy voice, “Why?” The answer to the call that was made yesterday when he was with Tim was, “Do it next time,” and then the other replied curtly, “I’ll do it tomorrow.” So he had a rough idea of the main character on the phone, but welcoming it is a separate matter. The smooth voice from beyond the receiver sounded like the melody of a delicate instrument flowing in the air.

[Is he here today too, friend?]

“Yes, he’s here.”

[Lies]

“……why did you call me?”

A low laugh rang out in the ears. He approached the refrigerator and opened the door, hoping that the story would last longer, and Alvin’s voice was caught in his ear again.

[He’s the one who came with you to arrest me then, right?]

“Well, he had a personal problem, so I kindly let him consult me.”

[Was it about you?]

“……I’m afraid to ask, but did you put a bug in my house?”

[Ahhaha, no way. I had the impression that if he had any problems, he’d settle them at a fancy bar with a nice atmosphere, that friend. But if he had to come to your house, I was wondering if the story was related to you. Expressing one’s desire to enter the other’s private sphere also means that he wants to check the distance from the other person and have a private conversation.]

“Well, it wasn’t a big deal. I’m such a man with lots of secrets. I guess he had a lot of questions.”

[Oh, about what happened ten years ago?]

The hand trying to pick up the can of beer stopped in the air. Jude, who had kept his mouth shut for a moment and had been alert to the sound beyond the receiver, soon shrugged and sighed loudly.

“I’m not in the mood to ask how you knew it. I thought I was hiding it in my own way, but why do you know all that? I’m losing the sense of mystery in my body.”

[Ha-ha, I’m still looking into you. I have friends. What happened?]

“I don’t know. You know I don’t remember. That’s what I told Tim.”

[Really?]

“What is really?”

The voice was low and determined, pleasant and pure.

[Really, don’t you remember anything?]

At the moment, the intense backlash that he had once felt since he got to know Alvin hit his chest. What he felt when he heard Alvin’s voice outside when he was crouching and shivering in the airplane bathroom, and why he really wanted to push the approaching opponent’s shoulder.

“……I’m tired, don’t pry.”

[Oh, I’m not forcing you. I won’t push you to the point where you say, “Stop it.” Tell me if you want to someday.]

The thought of eating ice cream, which had been shelved in the freezer for a year and a half, rose to his heart as he smiled impeccably on the other side of the phone. The power in the apartment was in bad condition and it has gone out several times since he stayed here, so he’s a bit afraid to open it. As he swallowed a sigh, he took out a can of beer and closed the refrigerator door, and Alvin’s voice rang quietly.

[Your friend, do you like him?]

“Huh? Ahh. Tim, he’s a really nice guy. I’m always indebted to him.”

[But you don’t intend to show him to the end. Who you are, what you live with.]

“Hey, I’m tired.”

[Unfortunately, I know you didn’t do it out of malice, but it’s bound to be harsh from his point of view. No matter how close you are, the real answer is never coming back.]

“I’m hanging up.”

[Gee, I didn’t mean to offend you. I don’t mean to criticize. There’s a good chance that detective-nim did it out of consideration for your friend. But detective-]

The voice was so soft that he felt like he was going to close his eyes unconsciously.

[Aren’t you lonely? Only by yourself, to keep walking.]

Once frowning, once biting his lips, once clenching a can of beer, Jude answered leisurely. He could hear the wind outside the window.

“Yes, I’m not lonely. I’m a man who loves solitude. It’s better to walk alone on the deciduous path than two.”

[Ahahahaha, haha…….. Yeah, I got it. I’ll admit it yet.]

“Anyway, let’s hang up so I can enjoy the solitude now. Let’s eat and go to bed. I’ve got a lot of reports today, and I’ve been running around all day. And stop calling me. If you get caught by the police, it only bothers me. Just write me letters as much as you can.”

[Wait, are you worried?]

“What are you talking about? I’m the only one who gets in trouble if you get caught, not you? Stop talking nonsense, Mr. Jones.”

[Don’t worry. I’m taking care of it so that it doesn’t bother you detective. I don’t want to make it difficult to talk to you. I don’t want to have a conversation recorded on the police tape with you either. So you don’t have to worry. ]

“Oh my God, thank you. Then I’ll hang up.”

[-I’ll call you again.]

“I wish you are a guy who wouldn’t do it if I told you not to.”

A clear laugh rang out once. Pressing down the phone power, Jude looked at the can of beer for a moment, and then approached the window instead of the sofa. The wind roared.

-The real answer is never coming back.

-It’s bound to be harsh.

The green eyes, were subtly distorted. There was, in fact, not one thing that he could sincerely refute on the memories of ten years ago, the reaction at the first scene, the words of the girl, and the facts that he heard them through the mouth of Tim—

The sigh formed white vapors on the window. Jude, who had unconsciously drawn his finger over it, soon shook his head with a flutter. The can of beer in his hand, which is rare, did not agree with his stomach. After shaking the can of beer, Jude eventually put down the can with a small sigh and instead picked up the food recipe he had just brought. Is there still a pot that is good enough to cook? Muttering, Jude closed the curtain first. The dull green filled the view.

The wind crying on the streets at night was unlikely to stop easily.