Just now I felt a slight chill, but I don’t know where it came from. It might’ve come from my back, but it also might’ve come from my hands and feet.
It’s just like when you’re taking a test and you read answer A, and then you read answer B and they both seem right. But I couldn’t remember the information in the textbook. The more you read, the more you get caught up in it, until you enter an irresolvable situation. It was like I was experiencing a déjà vu now.
In that situation, I probably would be like, “Whelp, that’s as good as this one” and choose one. Afterwards, I would comfort myself saying that that was the common sense thing to do.
Thus, for me, I decided to say that I felt the chill from my back.
But even if it was like that, I could not turn around to take a look, to see where the chill was coming from. Or I should say that I could turn my body, but that would be my imagination producing that sensation.
So it’s useless.
In order for people to be able to determine their position and direction, they need to have a reference point.
They can describe their location with coordinates in two dimensions or in three dimensions. However, they need a reference system. Moreover, we scarcely use coordinates to describe our position in three dimensions.
This person is next to that object, and is facing that direction.
That is how things are described, and how I view myself.
But doing that is not suited for my current situation.
Right now, I am wherever I think, facing whatever direction I think I am, so I can produce whatever feeling I think of. But that feeling does not represent reality.
Even if there are nerve impulses, it’s only a false construction made by the brain.
Maybe my body is fixed somewhere, or maybe I don’t have a body and am just a brain.
These are things I have no way of knowing.
So, I can only guess what I believe to be the closest answer.
And that is that I am not the only person waiting to be reincarnated here.
There is probably some person floating in this sea of consciousness, just like me. They are pondering on the origin of this sea, waiting for the end, waiting to be born anew. And then in this huge sea, we have temporarily crossed paths.
According to membrane theory, the big bang occurred because two parallel universes came into contact with each other.
But when he and I crossed paths, I felt that burst of cold.
If my theory is correct, then I can say that my consciousness is really small, so the chances of us coming into contact are very low.
Next time, I will pay attention to this.
That chill was a sudden feeling. If I recall correctly, it wasn’t a sensation of “cold I produced”, but “something that made me feel cold.”
Thus, the opposite party’s temperature must be lower than mine. But does a consciousness have a temperature?
Just as I thought over this, I heard a voice.
“Wherefore art thou going?”
It was a cold, female voice. It was hard to tell the age of the voice from just listening to it. It had the vivaciousness of a young girl, the sex appeal of a young woman, and the hoarseness of an elderly lady all mixed together.
I finally heard something. I did not know how much time had passed here after I first heard the voice.
I didn’t know whether or not the voice was made by my brain to combat boredom, but I wanted to answer her.
“I am a lost sheep. I do not know where to go.”
“Do you wish to go to hell, or to ascend to heaven?”
“I wish to abandon the original world, where all of the past is buried.”
After a long period of silence.
“Thou speak nonsense.”
“……”
“I ask thou, dost thou know where this is.”
“The creation of the world, atop the ark. In the original sea, on the final location.”
“No. This is a nightmare. I ask thou, what am I?”
“Hesitating in the waves, fearing the dream becomes nightmare. In the mundane world, thou art all living things and thou art not living.“ [1]
After, I saw a light.
A black light.
Something that only exists in a nightmare. Something that ordinary people could not imagine. There are many things that can be described but can’t be imagined. A fragment of a line is a point. A fragment of a plane is a line. A fragment of a solid is a plane. Then there is the super-solid, which has a fragment that is a solid. Even if you know this, I could not construct this four-dimensional super-solid in my mind very concretely.
For this reason, there are things that can be seen that can’t be described.
Black light, soft ice. What I was looking at at the moment was the former.
If you had to describe it, it was like there was a different shade of black inside of black, so it seemed like it was emitting light. But in reality, what I was seeing was not that. It wasn’t something produced by differing shades of black. It was simply black-colored light.
The evidence was, I could see a part of myself.
A body illuminated by blackness.
What astonished me was that floating inside my consciousness was Leon’s body.