A pitch black sky blankets the earth, on the wide road there is just the sound of horse hooves reverberating. I sit in the carriage and stare towards the East, where the grand city of Chang An is becoming farther and farther from me. Some time later, the sun rises over the East, just a few slivers, but itâs already brilliant, shining life on the horizon.
Slowly, in the clouds dotting the sly, a fiery explosion happens. A red round sun bursts from the flames and rises. In moments it has surrounded the vista and eliminated the darkness. There is likely nothing more astonishing than a sun rise, and Iâm stunned by this view outside the window. My lingering sadness dissipates and I raise my arms with a long howl, welcoming the arrival of a new day.
My howling causes the horse to almost stumble, but the driver rights it and we continue on our way. I laugh, thankful it was just one howl, anymore and Iâd be in the dirt right now with an overturned carriage. The day arrives and there are more travelers on the road, so I leave the carriage roof and go sit with the driver. Heâs a very hearty person, allowing me to sit there. He can tell I know martial arts, and hate being cooped up inside the carriage, so why am I not riding my own horse. I explain Iâve never learned to ride.
He pointed to Xiao Qian and Xiao Tao flying overhead, indicating I have a way with animals. If I practiced, heâs sure Iâll be a quick learner. As we head West, what was normally verdant land seems barren and run down, and I sigh about the ravages of war on the common people.
The driver sighed âIsnât that the truth. Weâve fought two wars with the Xiong Nu in the past year, with over ten thousand soldiers dead. How many wives lost their husbands, mothers lost their sons. Add to that a famine and money going towards war, where are the common people getting money to survive. When the battles are won, only the powerful are rewarded, and the common people continue to suffer.â
I am pleased with how thoughtful he was, and he explained that he is learned and during his many travels now as a driver, heâs had the chance to meet many people and hear different points of view. I ask if itâs true that there has been cannibalism in the region, and he confirms it happened during the early Han dynasty history when there were deadly natural disasters.
I discuss how Emperor Qin Shi Huang built the Great Wall and sacrificed tens of thousands of men, leaving him reviled in history. But scholars now understand that without the Great Wall, the Xiong Nu would have breached the border long ago and many more people would have died as a result. But he asks why we must suffer now for the greater good of people who come after us. He also has a point and I cannot refute it.
I ask if he knows about the story of how a Shan Yu of the Xiong Nu tribe greatly insulted Dowager Queen Lu? After the death of the first Emperor of Han dynasty Liu Bang, the Shan Yu sent a letter to Liu Bangâs Queen Yu. He said that since they were both widowers, they might as well just make do as a couple for the rest of their lives. It was a grievous insult, but since the Han Empire was still in its infancy and weak at that time, Queen Lu had to swallow her outrage and shame to be thus propositioned.
Since then, the Hans have send their princesses to be married to the Xiong Nu leaders to keep the peace. The hundred years of peace was purchased by the Han at the price of their most precious daughters, as well as offerings of gold. Our Han warriors are no weaker than the Xiong Nu, why must we bow to them and continue to supplicate before them?
He sighed, lamenting that heâs old now. If he heard me talk as a young man, he would immediately enlist with the Great General Wei or General Huo to go fight the Xiong Nu. I laugh it off, telling him that I was merely playing devilâs advocate to what he said, and throwing some thoughts around for discussion. He commented that while I look confident, perhaps I havenât made up my mind about life. Iâm just happy I have him for company on this long road to talk with.
He tells me that to get to Xi Yu, the faster route is to Dun Huang city, then passing through Long Xi, on to Xiu Zai, Zhang Ye, and finally past Xiao Ye Shi. I hear the words âLong Xiâ and immediately tell him to not head there, even if we end up taking a longer way. Iâll even pay him more. He agrees and we bypass Long Xi and head directly to Liang Zhou.
When we arrive at Liang Zhou it is already completely dark. We find a clean inn to spend the night, with my requirements very low except for needing hot water and a big tub to take a bath. Life in Chang An is too comfortable, so three days on the road and Iâm covered in dust and feel unbearable.
After changing water twice, I finally feel relaxed and clean. There are many hot springs outside of Chang An, but in the future I wonât have any hot springs to soak in. The hot springs in the Qing EstateâŠâŠdonât think about it, donât think about it, forget everything in Chang An.
Suddenly there was a gust of cold air that blew into the room. I notice the door has been opened a crack âGirl, donât boil anymore water, I still have another bucket I havenât used.â
The door closed with a sound. I picked up my silk sash with the gold bells and sent it flying to catch on the bucket of hot water. When the bells are released, I canât seem to pull it back. Iâm perplexed, what did it get hooked on? I remember telling the serving girl to put the bucket behind the paper screen so that I can retrieve it easily. How did it get stuck? I didnât misjudge the location!
Without a choice, I decide to stop being lazy and walk over there to grab it myself. I stand up in the tub, but give the sash one more jerk for good measure. The hot water bucket doesnât fly over, and instead the entire paper screen falls over with a resounding thud.
Huo Qu Bing is standing there, dressed all in black, his figure ramrod straight. Heâs holding my gold bells in his hand, staring at me with an expression of frigid darkness.
I am so shocked that I stand there for a good second, before reacting and diving back into the tub with a horrified yelp. I was just thinking the water was getting cold, but now my body is on fire.
Thank god I asked for an extra deep tub earlier, so now with my body submerged itâs not as likely to be revealing anything. I huddle in the tub and stare wide-eyed at him.
His expression remains the same, his eyes staring directly at me without blinking. That kind of coldness, even across this distance I can feel the frost radiating from him. All my shame disappears under the piercing gaze of his frigid stare.
Heâs really angry this time. No, Heâs really, really, really angry this time. The angrier the other person is, the more I need to remain calm. When the enemy has the advantage, one canât upset him more. Otherwise I donât even know where to look to collect my bones.
I swallowed and forced myself to be calm âDonât insult my vanity. Under these circumstances, you ought to have a manâs normal reaction. Either look at me lasciviously like a pervert, or try to be a gentleman and pretend to look elsewhere.â
His expression still remains unchanged, just giving me one more icy glare before he suddenly threw the gold balls towards my head. Iâm afraid to catch it with my bare hands, so I grab a robe from next to me and send it flying towards the gold balls. In the air the two form a Z, and I manage to defuse the velocity with which Huo Qu Bing threw it at me. If his strength is correlated to his anger, this time heâs extremely mad.
After I retrieve the gold balls, I realize that the robe I grabbed was my night clothes. I lose my pretend cool and hurriedly pull the robe into the water, and I huddle even deeper inside the tub. The water has turned cold, the clothes are next to me, but I canât put it on. I can only stick my head out of the tub and look around, finally giving Huo Qu Bing a pitiful look.
His sarcasm is biting âYou want me to have the normal male reaction, why donât you have the normal female reaction when a woman is caught in the bath by a man?â
Did he not think I was embarrassed? I was afraid of making him even more furious so I suppressed it, but now it comes right back out âAre you sure you want me to have the normal female reaction? You wonât stab me in the back afterwards?â
âIt doesnât feel good to stay in the cold water, does it?â He smirked.
I look at him, and suddenly start screaming âHelp!âŠ..Help!âŠâŠThere is a peeping tomâŠ..a peeping tomâŠâŠâ
His looked stunned and his eyes are finally not just reflecting icy coldness. âNow you should have the normal reactionâ I pointed my finger at the window âUnder these circumstances, you ought to be escaping through there.â
Footsteps sound on the hallway outside and get closer. âWhere is the peeping tom?â âThe sound came from the inside room.â âBut a 40 year old woman is staying thereâ âHow do you know a peeping tom might not like an older flowerâ âYeah, some might like my experienced allure, and what do you mean Iâm 40?â âStop arguing, we need to help the girl, a young one is staying inside so we should kick the door in.â âBut if we kick the door in, weâre no better than a peeping tom, letâs knock first.â
I inadvertently laughed, the He Xi people are so different than the Chang An people. These folks are just like the cutest wolves in the wolf pack. Huo Qu Bingâs expression is weird and then he walks straight towards me. Before I can scream, he pulled me right out of the tub. My body is wrapped in a towel and then completely enclosed by a blanket.
Iâm angry, and frustrated, and embarrassed and I rage âYouâre shameless!â
The noise outside the door quiets. But before the door is kicked in, Huo Qu Bing does behave like a normal person ought to in this instance, and he jumps out of the window. But Iâm not sure if carrying me as he jumped was normal or not?
The moment he left the inn, a soldier immediately walked up to him. Based on his dress, itâs not a low ranking soldier either. He averts his eyes, pretending that heâs not seeing or hearing the me that is heaved over Huo Qu Bingâs shoulder and currently screaming obscenities at him. He respectfully said âGeneral, these are the two fasted mounts in Liang Zhou.â
Huo Qu Bing swings on the horse and tucks me into his arms. I stopped yelling at him, worriedly asking âWhere are you going?â
âGoing back to Long Xi. By dawn we should be able to take a bath and be relaxed eating breakfast on the streets of Long Xi.â He replied.
âAre you insane? Iâm not going to Long Xi. My bags are at the inn, and my Xiao Tao and Xiao Qian. Let me go.â I squirm in the blanket like a silk worm, trying to sit straight so I can argue with him.
âSomeone will deliver your bags. Iâm in a rush so I have no time to mess around with you. If you donât behave, Iâm going to knock you out. You choose. Stay awake or get knocked out?â
His words are icy cold and hard as a rock, he is clearly not joking. I quieted for some time before looking for another avenue out âIâm not comfortable like this. I want to stick my arms out.â
âIâm quite comfortable with you like this. You arms are better behaved in the blanket. If youâre comfortable, that will mean Iâm uncomfortable.â
âHuo Qu Bing, you are a horrible lascivious shamelessâŠâŠâ
âŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠ
âDid you hear me? I called you a pervert. Youâre also aâŠâŠa jackassâŠ..and aâŠâŠmuttonheadâŠ.â I threw out every single insulting phrase I had ever learned in Chang An.
âŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠ.
When you are facing a brick wall, insulting and trying to punch it, but the brick wall has no reaction, in the end the end itâs myself that gets tired. I wearily and docilely rest in his embrace. The horse slowed down âI need to change horsesâ and before his words finished, he had jumped off one horse and onto another.
I was shocked âWhen you came, did you change horses like this?â âYes.â âArenât you tired? Even the new horse is tired.â âWhen chasing the Xiong Nu army through the desert, not sleeping for three days and three nights is not uncommon. Chasing you is easier than chasing the Xiong Nu.â
I wondered âHow did you get the news so fast?â He explained âDonât forget that you are still in Han territory, and there are a lot of army bases in the He Xi region. Housekeeper Chen sent the fastest courier to bring your letter, which arrived in my hands that very evening. Tracking you took a bit of time, otherwise it wouldnât have even taken three days.â
âThat damn Hong Gu, not listening to my orders.â âShe hasnât even berated you, and you are yelling at her? How can a general desert the army, that is a capital offense.â
âIâm tiredâ and I brazenly tried to change the subject. âClose your eyes if youâre tired, youâll be able to sleep well tomorrowâ and he adjusted my position so that I was leaning on him more comfortably.
âThis isnât comfortable, I canât fall asleep.â âYouâre obviously not tired enough, if you were, you would be able to sleep even when riding a horse.â âHave you slept like that before?â âYes.â âYou wonât fall asleep right now?â âNo.â âThatâs fine. I donât care if you tumble off a horse, just donât let me suffer.â âRelax and sleepâ His voice was calm, no longer angry or furious.
I huffed at him. Even though it wasnât comfortable, I actually nodded off. It was almost sunrise when we arrived at Long Xi. He just tossed me on a carpet and left without saying a word. Ay, heâs still angry!
My body is sore, but I have no time to pity myself. I start plotting how to escape. The key is how to sneak away under Huo Qu Bingâs watchful eyes. Once I enter the desert, I will become like a speck of sand. No matter the person, no one can find me.
I rolled around on the ground and managed to untie the outer sash. I dragged the blanket around looking for something to wear, but there was nothing. No wonder he just tossed me down and left. I was hopping around like a rabbit when he returned. He had bathed and changed, though it was still all black. The somber color on him looks wild and powerful, making him even more handsome.
Is this man made out of steel? From Liang Zhou to Long Xi round trip and he doesnât looked remotely tired. I stare at him âAre you giving me clothes to wear?â
He tossed a package on the pallet and then walked out without a word. Why was it a set of black menâs clothes? It even came with a white cloth to bind my chest. I railed at him for knowing even this. Even though this isnât ideal, having something to wear is better than nothing. I sigh and start to dress.
Itâs my first time wearing male attire, but I managed to put it on correctly. I walk around a few times and find myself rather charming. Huo Qu Bing has pulled open the door flap and is laughing at me âFix your hair first before you start preeningâ reminding me that my hair is a mess.
Even though I can plait beautiful braids, Iâve never done a male hairstyle before. After trying for some time, I still canât do it properly. Huo Qu Bing, who has been sitting behind me this entire time watching me, suddenly starts laughing. I violently use my hairbrush to hit his reflection in the mirror. If I canât hit him, hitting his reflection takes out some of my anger.
He suddenly took the hairbrush from me, and before I can ask why, heâs already grabbed my hair and started combining the mess I made. His touch is gentle as he fixes my hair. Looking at the two of us in the mirror, this image seems so familiar. Many years ago, there was also a man who loved me that carefully brushed my hair and taught me to braid it. My nose started reddening and tears came to my eyes. I lowered my head and stared at the ground, letting him fix my hair and secure it with a jade circlet.
âThere is still some time, Iâll take you to the streets of Long Xi to walk around and grab a bite.â He lightly said and didnât wait for my response before walking out.
I ask if the chef in the army base isnât good? âAny chef who cooks for me is the best in the Palace, but the little local Xi Yu dishes you like isnât his specialty.â I take a few steps and suddenly grab his arm âIs Li Gan at this base?â He stared at me âHeâs not hereâ and Iâm relieved and let go of his arm. âWhat exactly did you do to Li Gan that makes you so guilty around him?â I retort âNothing, I didnât do anything to him that I need to feel guilty about.â
He looked at me but didnât continue. As I walked, I continuously checked out the army base set up. Huo Qu Bing casually drawled âYou seem to be quite energetic. Why donât you think about what you want to eat. If I wake up tomorrow and canât find you, I will order that every single army commanded by me change its food source to wolf meat. I will also request that all Xi Yu kingdoms and their citizens use wolf meat to welcome the Han army.â
I angrily spit out âYou wouldnât dare!â
He calmly said âTry me.â
I glare at him but he doesnât seem to mind, instead smiling and walking forward. I continue to bore holes in his back. He walked further but didnât turn around, though his footsteps seem to slow. Itâs dawn and the Spring wind is mild. His figure, dressed in all black, doesnât seem to fit with the Spring light, giving off a sense of isolation.
My heart softened and I hurried to catch up to him. When he heard my footsteps, he didnât stop or turn around, but suddenly his figure seemed to blend into the warm Spring light. Even though Iâm much shorter than him, but weâre still taller than most people walking on the streets. Weâre suitable to be deemed dashing young men. Perhaps itâs my brilliant smile, and the contrast to his icy cold look, but all the ladies and girls keep staring at me. I smile when I meet their eyes, the older ones smiling back and the younger ones averting their eyes with a blush.
Strolling on the street, Iâm having a great time. If Chang An was a place where people were open, then Xi Yu is a place were people are bold. A flower girl threw a bouquet of plum blossoms in my arms, causing everyone to laugh and tease her. I remember that Iâm pretending to be a man, so I bow to the flower girl. Huo Qu Bing, who is still poker faced next to me, tosses some money to the flower girl. She huffs and throws it back to him âWho wants your money? That was my gift to that gentleman.â
It was likely the first time someone has angrily thrown money back at Huo Qu Bing, so heâs startled for a moment. The crowd chides him for not understanding the Long Xi peopleâs warmth. I drag Huo Qu Bing away and check out a few places before sitting down to eat. I see the forty-some lady owner and ask her for two bowls of fish noodles, but I call her big sister. She looks shocked and then pleased, smiling even more broadly when I give her the plum blossom bouquet. After we ate, Huo Qu Bing tried to pay but she refused to accept, saying she can afford to treat me to two bowls of fish noodles.
Since leaving the army base, Huo Qu Bing hasnât said anything to me, but suddenly he starts to laugh âI never knew you had the ability to eat free food.â I proudly smile back at him.
He continues âYou look like a boy when dressed like one, even when you walk you donât resemble a girl. I can relax and let you stay in the army base, you can be my personal bodyguard.â
I sass back âYou need to be careful. If you upset me, I can turn into your assassin at anytime.â
âIs Long Xi fun?â he asks, and I answer itâs fun. âIf itâs fun, then it was worth coming. Can you stop being mad now?â I wearily reply âThe legs are on my body, leaving is bound to happen. How long are you going to keep me here?â
He was silent for a moment âUntil you lose all hope and donât want to leave, or until I give up. Then I might let you goâŠ.or I might never let you go.â
I angrily kick the ground and shook my sleeve at me before stomping away. A Xiong Nu man was selling knives on the side of the street, in an area that is sparsely populated, and heâs not being very loud in soliciting customers. I was about to walk past when my eyes lit on something he was selling. I immediately turned back and he saw me staring at a knife. He put what he considered a good knife in front of me, but I just pick up a very uniquely designed knife. It was exactly like the knife I played with as a child. I ask him âWhere did you get this knife?â
He stuttered and tried to explain in broken Han that he got it from someone, who got it from someone else. I sighed. During the commotion back then, who knew which guard got a hold of it and thus it passed out of the court. So many years later, through so many different hands, itâs back in mine. I ask how much to buy it, but he keeps wanting to sell me a better knife. Huo Qu Bing impatiently just tosses money at him, more than what he thinks it is worth. I tell the seller that this knife is worth much much more than that, so he should keep the money.
Most people would only see this intricately designed knife with a dull blade and think it is just a ladyâs accessory. But they donât know that it was a custom knife maker who was the best in the Xiong Nu world who crafted it. Years ago, the Crown Prince of the Xiong Nu summoned that man, who used all his skill, to make this knife.
I clicked on a trap button in the knife, and then remember my anger from last night, so I raise my head towards Huo Qu Bing and huff âLetâs see if you dare be mean to me again!â before stabbing the knife into my chest. The knife seller gasped and Huo Qu Bingâs face lost every ounce of color. He wrenched me forward but it was already too late. The entire knife was buried in my chest and all he could do was hold my collapsed body in his arms.
I snuck a peek at him, wanting to scare him for a bit longer, but his hands, his entire body, was shaking, and the trembling actually made my heart hurt. I hurriedly got up and pulled the knife out with a giggle. When my hand touched the knife tip, it completely retracted into the handle. âDid you suddenly turn into a moron? Itâs not like you havenât killed a person before. When the knife enters the heart, how could there be no blood?â He stared at me and then roared âI am indeed a moron!â before turning around and storming off.
I ran after him âPlease donât be mad. My mischievous side suddenly came out so I wanted to joke around with you.â He refused to talk to me and continued to walk quickly, so I just followed behind him continuing to apologize. But he wouldnât even turn to look at me.
If he wasnât so concerned about me, with his battlefield experience, how could he not have seen that it was a joke? I remembered how pale his face looked and I feel really terrible and guilty. I softly explained âI know youâre not mad that I was joking around with you. Youâre mad that I took a risk with my life to play that joke. What if the knife hadnât work liked I expected?â I sighed âThis knife was a gift for me from a childhood friend. I used it to scare my Papa, how could I not recognize it? There is also a compartment inside that an hide fresh blood, so when you stab it in your heart, blood gushes out and makes it look real. When I saw the knife back there, all I could think of was my childhood, and my naughty personality from back then came back out. I canât believe so many years later, I actually found a childhood toy on the street.â
Perhaps it was the first time he had ever heard me talk about my childhood, so Huo Qu Bingâs expression warmed a bit âYou had a Papa?â I played with the knife in my hand âDid you think I was born this way? Of course I had a Papa who raised me.â
He was silent and then said âHaving a father, sometimes its like not having a father.â I knew he was thinking of his birth father Huo Chong Ru, who got his mother Wei Shao Er pregnant out of wedlock which resulted in Huo Qu Bing. He refused to marry her and wed another woman. Huo Qu Bing grew up without a father, and until after Wei Zhi Fu married the Emperor that his mother was married to Chen Jang and became Mrs. Chen. It was then Huo Qu Bing had a father in name. I tried to change the subject and started chattering about this and that with respect to this knife. When I saw his face ease, only then did I relax.
When we returned to the base, he asked âWant to catch up on sleep?â I shook my head, I wasnât sleepy anymore. He led me to the stables and a fourteen year old boy soldier came out with a horse âLi Cheng might be young but he is a skilled rider. You need to quickly learn to ride from him.â
I furrowed my brows âNot learning.â He furrowed his brows and silently stared at me.
Suddenly the sound of thunderous clapping reached us. He still stared at me silently, and I stared right back at him. The clapping got more and more urgent, and he finally sighed. He leaped on the horse and took off. I quizzically asked Li Cheng âWhy did he take off?â
He looked at me like I was an idiot âThe General has to go count the troops! In about three to four days, the army will be deploying for battle with the Xiong Nu.â
I wrinkled my nose and walked away, but Li Cheng quickly stopped me âGeneral ordered me to teach you to ride a horse.â I retort âIâm not learning.â and want to walk around him, but he tightly grasped my arm âYou must learn. If you donât learn, I canât fulfill my orders.â I rolled my eyes âSo? What does that have to do with me?â He was starting to sweat âIf I canât finish, the General will have a bad impression of me. Then he wonât let me on the battlefield to fight the Xiong Nu.â
I sighed and tried to get him to release me, but who knew this little pipsqueak had this much strength. He pleaded with me âHow can you not know how to ride a horse? The Xiong Nu are vicious. If you canât ride a horse, if something happened you would be in danger. You would be a burden to everyone.â
My hand was about to strike his neck when it stopped. If something happened, the first person I would burden would be Huo Qu Bing âYouâre still a kid. Why are not at home and here in the army?â His face stiffened âLast Fall, the Xiong Nu came to my city and killed my parents and sister.â I was silent and then slapped his shoulder âLittle teacher, letâs go learn to ride a horse. But remember not to be impatient with me, or laugh at me, or call me stupid. Otherwise beware of my fist.â
He rubbed his eyes and nodded. From morning to noon until it was pitch black, other than having lunch and a short break, I learned to ride a horse. From the horseâs back to the ground, I repeatedly alternated between those two places. In the beginning he complimented me âBrother Jin, you may look like a dandy, but you are a strong feller.â
Gradually, his expression changed from admiration to awe to shock and finally to fear. Until the end, when he cried and begged me not to ride anymore. I stumbled into the tent, where Huo Qu Bing was studying a map. He saw my ragged state, raised his eyebrows and looked at Li Cheng. The kid cried and looked at me like I was a lunatic, explaining how I was coming along in riding. After Huo Qu Bing got the update, he smiled and asked Li Cheng to prepare a bath.
When Li Cheng took off, I immediately flopped on the pallet. My bones felt like it was about to collapse, and I was so weak I almost slid right on the floor. Huo Qu Bing sat next to me and touched my bruises âDoes it hurt?â I kept my eyes shut and coldly huffed âWhy donât you take a couple dozen tumbles and let me know?â
He ordered me to turn around face down. âWhen you learn to ride for the first time, your back and waist will be sore. Iâll massage it for you.â In thought about it and turned around âGo light, my left shoulder really hurts.â
He lightly massaged my back and softly said âRiding a horse takes time to learn, why the rush? Itâs like you want to learn to ride in one day.â I humphed âWho told me this morning to quickly learn to ride?â âI thought you wouldnât do your best unless I said that.â I humphed again and didnât respond. He continued âThe army leaves tomorrow.â
I sat up in shock and turned my head to look at him âLeaving tomorrow? I just learned to ride fast, I canât even turn or stop yet. If Iâm not careful Iâll fall down. ButâŠ.but I guess I can try. I think Iâll use a rope and tie myself to the horse so that I wonât fall off.â
Huo Qu Bing laughed at me âStop being so insane. Who ever heard of a newbie learning to ride fast by the first day. Youâre just using your martial arts skills to let that horse run wild, because you know you wonât die. If I let you tag along with the army, youâll splinter the brigade. You donât need to come with me, stay here and learn slowly.â
I gave him a questioning look and flopped back on the pallet âYouâre not afraid of me running away?â He didnât answer and a soldier brought a bath in. When the soldier saw me on the pallet, he pretended he didnât see anything and quickly averted his eyes.
âGo wash! There are no maids here in the army, so just make do. If you care for it, Iâd be glad to assist you.â and he pulled me up. I coldly huffed at him and then sauntered over to bathe, letting down the curtains.
âYu Er, is something wrong with your mouth lately?â I was undressing and replied âWhat could be wrong?â âInstead of answering, you constantly humph and huff all the time, reminding me of a certain barnyard animal.â
âHumph!â I crawled into the tub and didnât bother to respond. He laughed outside âAnymore humphing, and Iâll call you little piggy from now on.â I comfortably laid down in the tub and closed my eyes, letting my weary bones coalesce back together.
âYu Er, stay here in the army and wait for me to come back. Iâll try my best to be fast. The quickest will be a few days, the longest will be ten days or more. I wonât let you wait too long.â I donât respond so he continues âI hear wolf meat is really unappetizing. I donât want to force myself to eat something disgusting.â
I loudly humphed âSince you already decided, why are you asking for my thoughts?â He called my name but then a soldier arrived announcing that a package was delivered, plus a cage with two pigeons. I immediately opened my eyes, my two little ones are finally here.
âGeneral, everything in the inn has been brought here. The two pigeons have refused food and water since last night, and when we try to force feed them, they become vicious.â Those two little things, why are they that stubborn? After hearing this, I can care less about the hot water and quickly climb out to dry myself, rushing to go see them.
Huo Qu Bing said âNo worries, theyâll be fine when they see their owner.â
âGeneral, there is another matter. When we were leaving the inn, someone was asking around about the young lady staying in room number 2, and where she wentâŠâŠâ The voice suddenly lowered and I tried to lean over to eavesdrop but couldnât make out what they were saying anymore.
When I heard footsteps leaving the room, I rushed out âXiao Tao, Xiao Qian, Xiao Yu is here!â
Crouched inside their cage, Xiao Tao and Xiao Qian both quickly got up. I opened the cage and let them out, seeing their food and water are still full. I put some seeds in my hands and Xiao Tao immediately started eating. Xiao Qian cocked his head at me, as if wondering why I abandoned them. I coax him to drink first, telling them not to blame me, blame HIM. I turned to give Huo Qu Bing a glare.
Huo Qu Bing walked over to me and watched them eat âWho knew these two pigeons were so emotional and stubborn. They would rather go hungry than eat from someone else.â I cleaned Xiao Taoâs feathers and laughed âOf course, in this entire world, other than me and JiuâŠ..â I stopped myself and took a deep breath, with a forced laugh âThey only know me, they will not eat from anyone else.â
I wish I could smile more naturally, smile like Iâve forgotten everything. But I know I canât, and my smile looks worse than crying. So I stop smiling and just quietly look at Xiao Tao and Xiao Qian eating their seeds. Huo Qu Bing suddenly stood up and walked to his table and lowered his head to look at the map.
I suddenly remembered earlier and asked âWhen my package was delivered, what was that about someone looking for me?â
Hup Qu Bing was drawing on the map and appeared not to have heard me. I asked again, and he responded without even raising his head âWhen you suddenly disappeared, the driver you hired was worried about you and looking for you.â I felt touched that he would worry about me.
Xiao Qian and Xiao Tao finished eating and returned to their cage to rest. I ask Huo Qu Bing âYou didnât rest at all yesterday, and youâre leaving first thing in the morning. Arenât you going to sleep?â He tossed his brush and stretched âI do need to get a good nightâs rest, otherwise it will be after this battle before I get another chance to sleep soundly.â
I yawned âWhere am I sleeping?â He pointed to the inside room âYou sleep in there, I sleep out here.â He ordered the room cleared and we went to bed. Laying on the pallet, I was about to think about all the crazy things that happened to me since yesterday, but I was so exhausted I just fell asleep immediately.
Right in the middle of a great sleep, I suddenly feel someone on the pallet, startling me awake. I immediately knew who it was and I turned around, facing outward. My eyes remained closed and I asked âWhat time is it? Youâre leaving? But the sun hasnât even come up yet?â
His low voice murmured âIâm leaving.â In the dark, his face comes closer and closer to mine, and I can feel his warm breath. My heart starts beating faster and faster, and Iâm too scared to open my eyes. I keep my eyes closed and pretend Iâm still half asleep.
âIf you need anything, ask Li Cheng to get it done. Donât be in such a rush to learn to ride a horse. Stay in the army base as much as you can. If you get bored then go find ladies to flirt with in the town. But remember always wear your male clothes.â I softly agreed and he didnât say anything else, just silently sitting there looking at me.
After awhile, he lightly stroked my head âIâm offâ and he stood up and walked outside. I couldnât help myself and called out âHuo Qu Bing.â He turned around and looked at me. I slightly raised myself off the pallet âPlease be careful.â
In the darkness came a smile as brilliant as the morning sun âI definitely will!â