Chapter 35

Perhaps it was because Yin Xiaoxiao had begun to eat meat later that, even compared to the other young snakes, he was still two sizes smaller and ten centimeters ¹ shorter. But compared to when he had just been born, he had grown a great deal. Oh, but Mo Laoda would have said, “You’re ten years old? Haha! It looks to me that you have the body of a seven or eight year old and the speed of a five or six year old!”

Ah well, now would be a good time to mention Yin Xiaoxiao’s sore spot. Which was speed! His speed would forever be Yin Xiaoxiao’s eternal sore spot! Yin Xiaoxiao just didn’t understand. Even now when he was ten years old his body was that of a seven or eight year old, so why didn’t he also have the speed of a seven or eight year old instead of a five or six year old?!  It was probably because Hua Xiaowu was just about the most active (?) that, out of all the young snakes, Hua Xiaowu’s speed and jumping abilities were the best. Cough cough. Everyone knew that Hua Xiaowu always followed Yin Xiaoxiao around. While for three months Yin Xiaoxiao was inwardly chanting to himself “I’m imagining things, I’m imagining everything about the people around me”, Hua Xiaowu was animatedly “showing off” his speed and jumping abilities to Yin Xiaoxiao. Yin Xiaoxiao exploded.

This could have been the greatest mistake of Hua Xiaowu’s 200 year life. Hua Xiaohua dared not stop Yin Xiaoxiao’s outburst, and neither did Yin Dabai. For three full months, Yin Xiaoxiao either forced Hua Xiaowu to remain still or had him try to learn how to arch his back and crawl like an earthworm. For three days, Hua Xiaowu tried his best but still couldn’t learn how to do the earthworm. Then, Hua Xiaowu exploded and yelled at Yin Xiaoxiao, “You also don’t know how to do it, so why are you  making me learn?!” Yin Xiaoxiao immediately showed Hua Xiaowu that he could, silently killing Hua Xiaowu’s outburst. For the remaining time, three months minus three days, Hua Xiaowu remained totally motionless. Even food had to be stuffed into his mouth by Yin Xiaoxiao. Naturally, after that, no snake in Yin Xiaoxiao’s family dared to show off his speed or jumping abilities in front of Yin Xiaoxiao. Yin Xiaoxiao was satisfied.

Returning to the previous topic, Yin Xiaoxiao painstakingly repressed the trauma surrounding his speed. Anyway, right now his own speed was enough to catch frogs and get bird eggs, so he was unlikely to starve to death. Yin Xiaoxiao genuinely didn’t feel there was anything wrong! What? You’re asking if he can catch birds? What did you say? What you said was unclear! I can’t hear you over the wind!

Ten years later, as before, Yin Xiaoxiao was the apple of his whole family’s eye. It was quite good to be pampered growing up. Look at the sunshine glistening off those scales! Look at those two silver, occasionally watery, eyes! Look at that slender and ever clean snake body (Yin Xiaoxiao’s cleanliness mainly the result of soaking in water everyday)! He looked small, but he could also be described as petite and delicate! Oh, that’s right. To describe the length and width of Yin Xiaoxiao’s body: his length from head to tail was now about a meter and a half ² . Thickness…even the thickest bottle of Nongfu Spring Water ³ was thicker than he was.

It was on this day, when Yin Xiaoxiao was headed back after he had finished eating at Lu Xiaohuang’s home — baked bird eggs — that he ran into Lan Yiyi.

Lan Yiyi’s eyes immediately lit up when he saw Yin Xiaoxiao and he promptly called out to Yin Xiaoxiao, “Xiaoxiao!”

“Huh?” Preoccupied with slithering forward, Yin Xiaoxiao heard a snake call his name. Puzzled, he raised his body to find that Lan Yiyi had called out to him.

“Xiaoxiao, today I caught a lot of food. Would you like to come and eat with me?” As Lan Yiyi spoke, he shyly lowered his head.

‘Huh?’ Yin Xiaoxiao was even more confused. ‘Lan Yiyi was the one who caught the food, so why was he asking me to eat it? And, I’m already full! Moreover I don’t eat raw food, and most of what Lan Yiyi caught was probably rat.’

“No need. I already ate,” Yin Xiaoxiao said. This didn’t count as lying to Lan Yiyi.

“Then eat again. I know you don’t like rat so I caught some birds,” Lan Yiyi promptly said. “I left the food not too far from here. We can arrive there very quickly.” Yes, Lan Yiyi also knew that Yin Xiaoxiao was a very lazy snake.

“But I really am full.” Yin Xiaoxiao felt awkward. When he saw Lan Yiyi’s face instantaneously become downcast, Yin Xiaoxiao couldn’t bear it. What could he say to this neighbor with whom he had been friends for ten years?! What could he say to this Lan Yiyi who had been so nice to him for ten years?! “Then-then let’s do it like this. I’ll bring the food with me and when I get hungry I’ll eat, okay?”

Immediately, Lan Yiyi was happy again. Even though Xiaoxiao wasn’t going to eat with him, Xiaoxiao still accepted the prey he’d caught. This was great progress! He was going to continue to do his best!

As Lan Yiyi led the way, Yin Xiaoxiao saw him act as though he had abruptly and inexplicably become injected with chicken blood ⁴ . These goods ⁵ wasn’t secretly psychotic, right?! At this thought, Yin Xiaoxiao’s speed unconsciously slowed and the distance at which he followed Lan Yiyi increased. Naturally, injected with chicken blood, Lan Yiyi didn’t notice anything strange with Yin Xiaoxiao’s behavior.

Yin Xiaoxiao slithered over to the place where Lan Yiyi had placed the food and saw that, sure enough, as Lan Yiyi had said, there were some dead birds beside only □□ more dead rats.

Lan Yiyi suddenly changed the plan, “Xiaoxiao, take all of these all with you. I will send you off.”

“Huh?” Yin Xiaoxiao said. “No need. You still haven’t eaten. You stay and eat.”

“It’s alright, don’t worry. I’m already full. Take these for your older brothers, Uncle Hua and Uncle Yin, and have a feast.”

When Lan Yiyi said it like this, Yin Xiaoxiao couldn’t refuse. ‘In any case, it was only a few rats. It wasn’t like it was something hard to find. If he wants me to take them back, then I’ll take them back.’ “Then that’s fine.”

The smile on Lan Yiyi’s face increased in size and, behind his body, his tail cheerfully and lightheartedly shook. He bundled up the corpses on the ground and held them with his tail. “Xiaoxiao, you take the birds. I’ll take the rest!”

Yin Xiaoxiao only had three birds to carry, one held in his mouth. Lan Yiyi followed him, dragging the pile of dead rats. Yin Xiaoxiao’s ⁶ teeth itched with anger. ‘Lan Yiyi is carrying so many things, he must be looking down on my small body! He definitely is!’ If Yiyi knew what Yin Xiaoxiao was thinking at this moment, he would definitely have yelled at the injustice. He was obviously interested in and treasured Xiaoxiao! How could it be said that he looked down on Xiaoxiao!

With Lan Yiyi ahead and Yin Xiaoxiao behind, it wasn’t long before they arrived at Yin Xiaoxiao’s home where Hua Xiaohua, Yin Dabai and the other five young snakes all were. As soon as they entered the cave, Lan Yiyi unknowingly affected shyness. “Uncle Hua, Uncle Yin, Xiaoyi, Xiaoer, Xiaosan, Xiaosi, Xiaowu. This food I caught, I bring as a present to all of you. Uh, I also caught Xiaoxiao some birds.”

Hua Xiaohua and Yin Dabai glanced at each other. Without needing to speak, a trace of a smile flashed through both pairs of eyes. Yin Xiaoyi was the first to speak, and he rudely said, “We can catch our own food. We don’t want yours. Take them back.”

“Xiaoyi!” Hua Xiaohua glared at Yin Xiaoyi, then smiled at Lan Yiyi and said, “Yiyi, we’ve truly inconvenienced you. Rest assured, we will eat all that you brought.”

After that statement, Yin Xiaoyi didn’t have the chance to object again. Lan Yiyi listened with great delight to what Hua Xiaohua said, then said goodbye and left.

“Xiaoxiao, you must not spurn Lan Yiyi’s kind feelings, understand? Eat the birds that he caught for you first.” Hua Xiaohua’s eyes narrowed as he smiled.

“I’m not hungry now. I’ll eat when I’m hungry.” Yin Xiaoxiao placed those birds in a corner of the cave. Yin Xiaosi, with a serious look on his face, also dumped the dead rats into a corner. Yin Xiaosi mentally rolled his eyes. Tsk tsk, his eldest brother was really a brocon ⁷ — brocon was also a word that Yin Xiaoxiao had taught everyone.

“Xiaoxiao, are you going to take a bath today? Oh, but if I recall, you must have bathed two days ago.” Hua Xiaowu moved closer to Yin Xiaoxiao. Yin Xiaoxiao thought about it and agreed. And so a party of six snakes informed both Hua Xiaohua and Yin Dabai, then left the cave.

Just as Yin Xiaoxiao could now bask in the sun for a bit, the other five young snakes had also gotten into the habit of taking baths. A habit which started after Hua Xiaoer, Hua Xiaosan and Hua Xiaowu found out that the reason why Yin Xiaoxiao’s scales were so shiny, a shine that they drooled over, was because he went into the water everyday. Soon after, the three young snakes also began to clamor to go into the water.  Yin Xiaoyi and Yin Xiaosi surrendered to majority rule — majority rule was also one of Yin Xiaoxiao’s sayings — and now all six of the young snakes were in the habit of taking baths.

Hua Xiaohua remained inside the cave and watched the young snakes slithered away. Then he said, “Lan Yiyi, this child is very good.”

Yin Dabai thought, then said, “He is good. Lan snakes are second only to the snakes of the Mo and Hei viper clans. From this viewpoint, he’s in no way inadequate for our family’s Xiaoxiao. We can also say that we’ve watched Lan Yiyi grow up. His character is quite good and he played with Xiaoxiao a lot as children. In the future, if it’s nurtured, the relationship will become better and better.”

Hua Xiaohua agreed, “That’s right, that’s right. When Xiaoxiao becomes an adult the two snakes can get married, and then like this the two of us can relax.”

Now look here, Yin Dabai and Hua Xiaohua, barring some catastrophe, Yin Xiaoxiao’s future marriage has already been decided.

Two flower blossom, one on each branch ⁸ . Hua Xiaowu, who had been slithering nicely beside Yin Xiaoxiao, was forced on ahead by Yin Xiaoyi. Yin Xiaoyi deliberately slowed down. Yin Xiaoyi bit Yin Xiaoxiao’s tail. He began to react, then realized that Yin Xiaoyi had something to say.

“What happened, Da-ge?”

Yin Xiaoyi looked at the four snakes ahead and lowered his voice to ask, “Xiaoxiao, do you like Lan Yiyi?”

“Huh?” Yin Xiaoxiao hesitated then asked, “What kind of like?”

Yin Xiaoyi said, “The kind of like where you want to live together with them for the rest of your lives.”

“How could that be?” Yin Xiaoxiao’s eyes grew large, not knowing why Yin Xiaoyi was asking this. “I don’t like Lan Yiyi! Da-ge, why would you ask that?”

Hearing Yin Xiaoxiao’s answer, he looked again at Yin Xiaoxiao’s face and realized that it really didn’t look as though he were lying. Yin Xiaoyi’s voice relaxed. “Then, that’s good. Xiaoxiao, I’m telling you that if Lan Yiyi approaches you in the future, stay away, do you understand? If he gives you anything in the future, you must not take it, do you understand?” Yin Xiaoyi was very concerned that his smallest, most dearly loved young brother would be kidnapped by this person. Lan Yiyi, that boy, thought that he didn’t know? From the first time he’d seen Xiaoxiao, he had designs on Xiaoxiao! How could something like Lan Yiyi be worthy of Xiaoxiao?! Their family’s Xiaoxiao deserved only the best viper!

“Da-ge, you mean…Lan Yiyi likes me?”

Yin Xiaoxiao nodded, solemnly.

“That can’t be?!” Yin Xiaoxiao was shocked. He was barely ten years old. At that age…wasn’t Lan Yiyi too precocious?! “Even if Lan Yiyi gave me something, that doesn’t mean that he likes me, right?”

Yin Xiaoyi snorted. “If only that was true. Why else would Lan Yiyi treat you so well? Then think about it, aside from Lan Yiyi, Erer, Sansan and Sisi, who else gives you things?”

Yin Xiaoxiao thought and thought some more. The facts really did support Yin Xiaoyi’s theory. Yin Xiaoxiao was a little convinced. But the more he thought of his normal interactions with Lan Yiyi, the more Yin Xiaoxiao thought that the theory ⁹ wasn’t quite right. “I understand, Da-ge.”

Although Yin Xiaoxiao’s voice sounded calm, in his heart he was being driven mad! Vipers reached adulthood at 30 years of age. Yin Xiaoxiao ¹⁰ was barely ten years old this year. If 18 years, in his previous incarnation, marked adulthood, then, converting it to snake years, he was no more than six years old this year! Even if this was puppy love, it was still too early! And he didn’t even have any feelings for Lan Yiyi. In the future, it would be best for him to maintain distance from Lan Yiyi. He shouldn’t let Lan Yiyi keep hoping. The more hope he had in the future, the greater his disappointment would be.

T/N:

Footnotes

<ol>about 4 inches about 5ft 农夫山泉瓶: Nongu Spring Water Bottle 打了鸡血: used to refer, usually in a mocking way, to someone who suddenly becomes energized or excited over someone or something; the phrase itself originated from the 1980’s as a form of pseudo-medicine in which people were literally injected with chicken blood to increase strength 这货: this guy added for clarity 弟控: used to describe the “complex” of really liking one’s brother or “brother”. Could be romantic or could be used to describe a sibling who is really doting/worried/obsessed/etc 花开两朵，各表一枝: a literary device in which the author acknowledges that the narrative has developed so that two or more scenes are happening at once and that each one will be described in turns added for clarity added for clarity</ol>