Chapter 30

It was still raining by the time Yin Xiaoxiao’s family went to bed. Yin Xiaoxiao couldn’t help but sigh. This rain really wasn’t stopping, and he didn’t know when it would end. It was startling.

“Calm down, calm down. When you get up early tomorrow morning, it’ll be clear.” Hua Xiaohua comforted Yin Xiaoxiao with such certainty that it would make anyone suspicious. But who was Yin Xiaoxiao? He was Mo Laoda’s Little Idiot, so he didn’t think that Hua Xiaohua’s tone was even a little suspicious.

Ultimately, by the time the whole family of snakes got up early the next morning, the sky had already cleared.

Yin Xiaoxiao went out for a walk, did a lap, then returned.He was in an undeniably cheerful mood. Although it had rained all day yesterday, the road or whatever that he’d traveled was as dry as the ground. Even though his body was sticky with dew and such, it wasn’t dirty. At first, Yin Xiaoxiao had been worried that, after both going and coming, his body would end up covered in mud. And although Yin Xiaoxiao couldn’t be called mysophobic ¹ , it also wasn’t in Yin Xiaoxiao’s character to allow his entire body to become dirty.

“Dabai is responsible for Xiaoxiao’s bird eggs. I’ll go and get food.” Hua Xiaohua tossed out curtly then pulled Yin Dabai away. Yin Xiaoxiao was suspicious, regardless of whether it was Yin Dabai going to look for food or Yin Dabai going to look for bird eggs.

Suddenly the day again became leisurely. But that said, Yin Xiaoxiao, when are you not idle, huh?

Well it was just like he said, because Yin Xiaoxiao was idle. He had nothing to do. He was bored. And thus, Yin Xiaoxiao returned to the thoughts that he’d had yesterday and started to become restless. What were these thoughts? That’s right people, Yin Xiaoxiao was thinking about his standard of living ² .

However, this was very easy to say but would be more complicated to do. As previously stated, if Yin Xiaoxiao had been reborn as a bear or a dog or something, he could use claws or whatever. For instance, he could hold a stick between two paws and drill wood to make a fire ³ , but Yin Xiaoxiao didn’t have claws. The only body parts he could use right now were his mouth and his tail. But even as a snake, Yin Xiaoxiao believed that, with his human brain, he could make fire.

…But even to drill wood to make fire meant that he needed wood, right? Yin Xiaoxiao thought of the environment surrounding his home and despaired. What? You said that grass can also be used? Then you rub two blades of grass together and see you end up with a fire!

Yin Xiaoxiao rolled his eyes then slithered over to Yin Xiaosi. “Si-ge, are there really no trees near our house? There’s really, really no trees at all?”

“What are you looking for a tree for?” Yin Xiaosi squinted at Yin Xiaoxiao.

“…For something that could be useful to our family. Si-ge, quickly tell me~!” Yin Xiaoxiao began to act like a spoiled child. ‘Hmph, if I were to tell you now that it was to make a fire, you would definitely stop me!’

Yin Xiaosi shivered. “…The area near our home really doesn’t have any trees. But if you arrive at Lan Yiyi’s family’s home then go east, there are a few trees. I remember seeing some at Lan Yiyi’s house.”

“Really really?” Yin Xiaoxiao felt their family’s Si-ge was really amazing. He had an answer for everything he was asked. “Then let’s all go together, okay?” First of all, neither Hua Xiaohua and Yin Dabai nor the other young snakes would allow Yin Xiaoxiao to go by himself. Second, if Yin Xiaoxiao went on his own, it would just be one snake with little strength who wouldn’t be able to bring much back with him. Naturally, everyone going together would help him move things!

Yin Xiaosi thought that Yin Xiaoxiao wanted everyone to go together to get bird eggs, so he tactfully advised Yin Xiaoxiao, “…There aren’t any bird eggs in those trees. Lan Yiyi said there once were birds over there, but because Lan Yiyi’s father frequently went to take bird eggs, those birds no longer go there. Besides, Dad already went to get bird eggs for you so we shouldn’t go.”

“Si-ge, I’m not going there for bird eggs! I want to go and gather some branches.” At Yin Xiaoxiao’s completely innocent expression, Yin Xiaosi was unable to refuse. And anyway, if Yin Xiaoxiao wasn’t going to do something dangerous, who would refuse Yin Xiaoxiao’s request? Although Yin Xiaosi didn’t know what Yin Xiaoxiao was going to do with branches, that was in no way going to stop Yin Xiaosi from agreeing to Yin Xiaoxiao’s request.

And so, a party of six snakes set forth on a quest to collect branches.

Because the trees were to the east of Lan Yiyi’s family’s home, Yin Xiaoxiao’s party didn’t head towards Lan Yiyi’s home but, Instead, headed east while still far from Lan Yiyi’s. Naturally, Yin Xiaosi was leading the way.

By the time they arrived at their destination, Yin Xiaoxiao discovered that, although there weren’t many trees, they all looked very big and thick. Not only that, but on the ground there were many fallen branches and the like, which were very convenient for a snake like Yin Xiaoxiao to pick up and take…only…Yin Xiaoxiao gazed at the branches in front of him and wanted to cry. This was a problem. How could he have forgotten that the branches would be wet after it rained?! Maybe he was a little too inexperienced *cries*!

But all this work couldn’t be in vain. Yin Xiaoxiao covertly turned around for a glance at everyone and was promptly scared into turning back around. Why was everyone looking at him with such gazes full of expectation? Now he definitely couldn’t give up!

Yin Xiaoxiao thought, then turned around and said, “Aha, next I’ll assign everyone roles. Er-ge and San-ge, you two are responsible for…” Yin XIaoxiao slithered over to a branch that was as thick as an adult man’s arm. “You two are responsible for carrying this back.”

“Okay.”

“No problem!”

And so, Hua Xiaoer and Hua Xiaosan accommodatingly ⁴ went to carry that large branch.

“Da-ge, Si-ge, Wu-ge and I, we’re going to collect these thin and small branches, bundle them  together and return with as many as possible.”

And so the remaining young snakes began to move.

Yin Xiaoxiao picked up thin and small branches, mainly because he thought that it was a good day to sun-dry these branches. After all, it was over 40°C. By evening, these twigs would probably already be dry.

He waited until everyone was done, then they all set off back to their home! Hua Xiaoer and Hua Xiaosan were in front with Yin Xiaosi and Yin Xiaoyi following closely behind. Next came Yin Xiaoxiao, and last was Hua Xiaowu. Carrying piles of branches, the six young snakes  passed over mountain ridges ⁵ . How did it look? It looked pretty funny! Fortunately, no other snakes saw this journey!

By the time they arrived home, Yin Xiaoxiao was so tired he saw stars. In comparison, the other five young snakes looked fresh and invigorated. Yin Xiaoxiao’s teeth itched. How hateful! Should there really be such a large difference?!

Seeing it become warmer and warmer, Yin Xiaoxiao promptly said to the crowd of young snakes, “Okay, listen to me. All of these branches that we brought back, put them in the empty space in front of our cave. Let’s try to get these branches sun-dried before tonight.”

While everyone was occupied arranging branches, Yin Xiaoxiao stared worriedly at the thick branch that Hua Xiaoer and Hua Xiaosan had carried back. It was so thick that he wasn’t sure that it would be dried by evening. If it didn’t dry, it wouldn’t work.

“Xiaoxiao, don’t you worry. This one will also be dry by evening.” Belatedly, Yin Xiaosi noticed that Yin Xiaoxiao looked anxious. He slithered over to Yin Xiaoxiao and said, “Don’t underestimate the temperature.”

Yin Xiaoxiao thought about it. What Si-ge said was true. While in his past life as a human, the hottest days were in the early 40’s ⁶ (he had never personally experienced this kind of temperature in the past, but there had been places, such as in the south, where the weather was even warmer than this), here it was common for it to exceed 40°C. When it was the warmest, he either stayed in the cave or in the brook, and only god knew how hot it really was! So why wouldn’t this thick branch dry in the sun?! Just in case it didn’t dry, he placed it in a central spot

When it was hottest, he was either staying in the cave or staying in the brook, and god only knew how hot it was! Now, why wouldn’t this thick branch dry in the sun?! Precisely in case it didn’t dry, he placed it in a central position. With it there, Yin Xiaoxiao would feel reassured when thinking that it wouldn’t be usable.

Then, Yin Xiaoxiao realized and, elated, stated, “The branches only need to be turned over periodically to make sure they dry evenly” and then he slithered back into the cave. Oh, wow, yeah. It really was hot and no mistake ⁷ .

Inside the cave, Yin Xiaoxiao not only availed himself of the cool, but also took a very satisfying nap. Outside the cave, the young snakes were thoroughly miserable. Since Yin Xiaoxiao had made that statement about turning over the branches to ensure they dried evenly, none of these young snakes took a nap. This entire noon and afternoon was spent turning over branches. When the temperature felt less warm that it had been, Yin Xiaoxiao slithered out of the cave and saw the tableau of exhausted and yawning snakes periodically turning over branches.

Yin Xiaoxiao felt his nose become sore ⁸ and wanted to cry.

“Xiaoxiao, you woke up.” Hua Xiaowu was the first to notice Yin Xiaoxiao standing in the mouth of the cave. “Xiaoxiao, look. Did these branches dry evenly?”

Yin Xiaoxiao slithered over, not only looking at Hua Xiaowu’s but those of all the other snakes, and found that even the thick branch was dry.

“They’re all dry,” Yin Xiaoxiao mumbled to himself, then very fiercely raised his head to stare at each young snake present. “Are you stupid? If you’re tired you should sleep! Leave these branches here for a few hours, they will dry enough on their own!”

“Xiaoxiao said that the branches should be turned over.”

“We all did as Xiaoxiao said.”

Even if this ought to have been said in condemnation, Hua Xiaoer and Hua Xiaosan’s expressions told Yin Xiaoxiao that they felt very happy.

WIthout turning his head, Yin Xiaoxiao shouted, “Alright, alright. All of you go and take a good nap.”

Hua Xiaowu, the closest to Yin Xiaoxiao, asked, “What’s to be done with these branches? And what are you up to, Xiaoxiao?”

“Just place these branches here. It’s not like they’re going to run away! First, all of you go to bed. By the time you wake up, I’ll tell you what I’m going to do with them. Quickly sleep, quickly sleep.”

Although the crowd of young snakes very much wanted to know what Yin Xiaoxiao was going to do with these branches, they were unable to change Yin Xiaoxiao’s mind and had no choice but to go to sleep.

When the very close and intimate Yin Dabai and Hua Xiaohua returned home, they saw that the empty land in front of their family’s cave was covered in branches. After searching for quite a while, they found six young snakes sleeping amongst the branches. Naturally, that thing ⁹ , Yin Xiaoxiao, was lying on the ground pretending to sleep. According to Yin Xiaoxiao, ‘If I can’t face the noon sun, then can’t I feel the twilight’s sunset?’

Hua Xiaohua immediately began to fuss, “What is all this, what is all this? How did these branches get here?”

Hua Xiaohua’s sudden cry woke the young snakes who looked at Hua Xiaohua, puzzled. Yin Xiaoxiao’s lips curled. “I asked my older brothers to help me bring them back.”

Surprised, Hua Xiaohua asked, “Xiaoxiao, what are you going to do with all these branches?”

Yin Xiaoxiao raised his head and looked up at the sky, then bowed his head and looked down at the ground. Helplessly, he said, “In that case, I’ll show you.”

Yin Xiaoxiao slithered over to that thick branch, looked carefully at the small holes in the branch, then compared the small holes with the small branches on the ground. Finally, he selected one particularly thin twig. Yin Xiaoxiao inserted this thin twig into one of the small holes in the thick branch, rotated it, and found that it was quite suitable. Now he knew that there was at least half a chance of success. The next step was the most crucial.

And so, the snakes present all were fortunate to witness another side of Yin XIaoxiao: Yin Xiaoxiao turned around, a malicious glint in green eyes and the traces of a nasty grin at the corners of his mouth. Without exception, all snakes present were frightened and retreated several paces.

“Xiao-Xiaoxiao, what are you doing?” Hua Xiaowu appeared to be quite frightened. If Hua Xiaowu had hands, by now he surely would have had both hands folded over his chest in an expression (….) of self-defense.

Several thoughts flashed lightning-quick through Yin Xiaoxiao’s mind. Still, at the end, his gaze rested on Hua Xiaohua and Yin Dabai.

“Pop, Dad, would you both do me a favor?” Yin Xiaoxiao’s smiling expression was exactly that of someone scheming.

Hua Xiaohua and Yin Dabai shared a glance, unaware of what Yin Xiaoxiao had planned. In the end, Yin Dabai was the first to open his mouth, “What is it?”

Yin Xiaoxiao turned  and pointed at the place where he’d inserted the thin stick into the hole in the thick branch, then he turned back around. “Dad, Pop, you stand on either side then hold this branch between your tails and rub continuously.”

“And then?”

“Then wait until the inside starts to smoke,” Yin Xiaoxiao said. “Oh, that’s right,” Yin Xiaoxiao suddenly remembered, and scraped some fine sand from the ground and out it into the small hole. He hope that this would increase the friction. As a snake, these conditions really weren’t that

smoke comes out from inside,” Yin Xiaoxiao said. “Oh, that’s right,” Yin Xiaoxiao suddenly remembered something and scraped some fine sand from the ground to put into the small hole. He hoped that like this it would increase the friction. It really wasn’t too bad to do this as a snake.

Yin Dabai and Hua Xiaohua did as requested, parting ways as they crawled to either side of the thick branch and two tails wrapping around the thin twig. Yin Xiaoxiao wasn’t sure if he was imagining this, but he thought Pop and Dad were blushing?

“…You can start rubbing.” Yin Xiaoxiao stared with large innocent eyes.

…And the rubbing began.

Yin Xiaoxiao’s eyes swirled ¹⁰ . It should be mentioned that, as expected, these snakes really weren’t regular snakes! They were rubbing so fast! He couldn’t even clearly distinguish between Pop and Dad’s tails and could only pick out different colors as they blurred together!

Very quickly, maybe after only two or three minutes, Yin Xiaoxiao saw smoke wafting from the small hole. Yin Xiaoxiao thought it might be better for them to keep rubbing for a little while longer. He had just thought this when he heard Hua Xiaohua cry out in fear leap a good ways away. Yin Xiaoxiao looked carefully and found that even Yin Dabai had jumped a good distance. He looked again at the small hole. So, it was already on fire.

Yin Xiaoxiao saw Hua Xiaohua and Yin Dabai’s faces were already full of fright. Then he turned and saw that the other young snakes were also scared. Yin Xiaoxiao was bewildered. Was it possible that snakes were afraid of fire? But snakes liked basking in the sun. Why would they be afraid of fire?

…Yin Xiaoxiao, you idiot. Snakes were still wild animals. Why wouldn’t they be afraid of fire? They like sunshine because sunshine could keep them warm and was also unlikely to burn them to death. But fire was different. There wasn’t a living creature, other than humans, who could use and not fear fire.

T/N: Rolls up late with Starbucks.

Footnotes

<ol>a phobia of being unclean or contaminated 生活: has multiple meanings including the activities of everyday life 钻木取火: a primitive way of making fire by using friction generated by inserting a stick into a hole in another piece of wood and then rotating the stick to generate fire through friction 哼哼哈哈: used to describe the appearance of being accommodating or perfunctory 翻山越岭: idiom meaning facing many hardships over a journey 40°C is 104°F 有木有: pun because 有木有 means that there’s wood, but is also slang for ‘come on, you can’t deny it’ 鼻子一酸: describing the prickling sensation inside a person’s nose/the runny nose that develops when crying 那货: a slang way to refer to someone; can be a little derogatory but isn’t meant maliciously 眼晕: seems to be referring to that phenomenon in anime where dizziness, confusion, mind-control or unconsciousness is conveyed by swirly eyes</ol>