After receiving a valuable lesson on instant noodles from me, the group of ladies suddenly had no more interest in chatting. They were all looking for excuses to leave. I think this is a bad gesture, as gesture of tearing down the bridge after crossing the river.* (T/N: Partly to "abandon" the person who helped you after achieving your goals. She probably meant imparting her instant noodles knowledge to them.)
When I was preparing to lift up my plate to continue eating every dish on the long table, I realized the vixen is still leaning on the table. Unsure of when she had another glass of red wine on her hand, she gently swirled her wine and asked, "What is your name?"
I looked left and right to make sure that she was talking to me and answered, "Chen Xiaoxi, the 'Xi' from hope."
She raised her glass towards me and bottoms up-ed the wine. She then said, "Hu Ran Ran, the "Ran" from having affair with people." (T/N: To have an affair with people (plural sense) is 跟人有染 (Gen Ren You Ran). The same 'Ran' in Hu Ran Ran's name.)
I looked around, unable to find any glass of wine to return her toast. So I lifted my plate of sushi to return her the toast instead. I ate the sushi in one mouth, almost choking to death. Finally I rubbed the tear off the corner of the eye and said, "Nice meeting you."
"You don't have to cry from feeling moved." She said as she passed a tissue to me. I was quite shocked from the fact that she didn't seem to have any clutch or bag on her. Her dress was stuck onto her like a second layer of skin that will burst upon breathing. I don't think that she can stuff any tissue in that.
I took the tissue and said thanks.
She just leaned on the table while looking at me walking back and forth the table and eating happily, she asked if it's delicious.
"Its delicious! Do you want some?" I pointed at the cakes in my plate. Only then did I think of her caviar analogy and felt that it was unnecessary.
She pointed at her qipao that she was wearing and said, "It will burst if I eat."
I nodded and open my palm to show her the tissue that she passed to me and said, "Your dress is too scary. Where did you put the tissue?"
She pointed in between her legs and said, "Stuck it against my inner thighs, together with my phone."
I looked her at smooth legs that were not donning any stockings. I twitched my mouth and looked at the tissue on my palm. It didn't feel right to be holding or throwing it away. I'm having mixed feelings knowing that it was taken out of her inner thighs.
Hu Ran Ran laughed out loud and said, "I'm just joking! How cute. I took it from the table."
I sheepishly rubbed the back of my neck and laughed along, "I only have eyes for food."
I finished eating 58 dishes with her looking at me. I took a piece of serviette and imitated her by leaning sultrily on the table and wiped my mouth.
Hu Ran Ran turned her head to looked at me and asked, "Are you the doctor's girlfriend?"
I touched my nose and replied, "Sort of."
Also secretly adding a "used to" in my heart.
She tucked her hair behind her ears and said, "Zhang Qian Rong will snatch from you."
"Ah? Who?" I asked while trying to stop myself from staring at her dark brown wavy hair.
Her hairstyle is my favorite big, wavy, hairstyle. I wanted to do it when I was in university. But Jiang Chen said I looked refreshing and natural in short hair. That was how I donned a mushroom bob hair for four years. It was only until we broke up that I grew out my long hair. Now that I think of it, how is refreshing and natural a compliment? It's more like a line in an air freshener commercial.
"Zhang Qian Rong, Old Zhang's granddaughter. There, she's currently walking towards your boyfriend." Hu Ran Ran said while pointing with her chin.
I followed her line of sight and saw Zhang Qian Rong walking towards Jiang Chen and Secretary Zhang. Swaying her hips like she was performing a ribbon dance.* (T/N: A traditional Chinese dance.)
"Old Zhang is really old." Sighed Hu Ran Ran. "The most a few more years to live."
I looked at her in surprise. She laughed and said, "If I said I'm his mistress would you believe?"
I forced out a laugh not knowing what to reply.
She continued, "I used to be a nanny in their house."
I couldn't control myself and went, "Ho..w…?"
I wasn't able to find the right words to phrase my question. Thankfully she continued it for me.
"How was I able to climb onto Old Zhang's bed? Whenever he is the only one left at home, I'll mop the floor wearing a low-cut nightgown."
"I see…" I dragged my words as I am not sure what to reply. I can't be praising her for that, neither can I wish for her to succeed. Even more impossible for me to be calling her shameless. Ah, what a difficult situation I'm in.
She was laughing and seemed to be enjoying my embarrassment.
I'm glad to be of amusement to you.
"Your boyfriend's coming." She said while covering her mouth.
"Ah?" I looked up, and Jiang Chen was already standing in front of me. I couldn't help but praise him saying, "You sure walk fast."
Jiang Chen politely nodded to acknowledge Hu Ran Ran's presence. Then he looked at me and said, "Let's go."
He walked off right after finishing his sentence. I waved goodbye to Hu Ran Ran and ran in small steps to catch up to him while asking, "We can leave? But the banquet hasn't ended yet."
He stopped walking until I'm beside him. We walked out side by side as he answered, "We're going back. I still have an operation tomorrow."
"Oh," I followed him out.
He went to get his car while I waited outside the hotel. Suddenly remembering that he didn't seem to have eaten anything. Moreover, he had gastric pain before coming. Hence I decided to discreetly return to the banquet to get some food for Jiang Chen. I only took two steps before hearing a honk. I turned back to open the door and propped half my body in to say, "Aren't you having gastric pain? I see that you didn't eat anything just now, I'll go take some food for you. Will be back soon."
Just as I turned to walk back in right after finishing my sentence. Jiang Chen repeatedly shouted my name behind me. I had no choice but to walk back and said, "Don't worry. The food's really great inside. There's nobody eating it anyways. No one will mind even if I were to take some."
"Get on." He said while tapping the steering wheel impatiently.
I came to a sudden realization that ever since we met again, he has been strangely losing his patience with me often. I'll give you an analogy. It's like you when only raised a dog with the intention of slaughtering it to eat. However, not only won't the dog grow any meat, but he thinks that he is a beloved pet, always trying to get attention from you. Don't you think it's annoying?
I entered the car silently, closed the door and put on my seat belt.
"I live at XX neighbourhood XX street. If it's not convenient you can just drop me off at any bus stop. I can take bus back."
He stared at me for quite some time. They say the eyes are the windows to one's soul. Hence I stared at his windows for a while, only to think that his dark circles are quite severe. However say the saying goes, "Even if you walk a cow to Beijing it is still a cow."* Even when a handsome guy grows dark circles, he is still a handsome guy but with dark circles. (T/N: this is translated literally.)
In the end I was still unable to see anything from his eyes. Eyes are indeed the windows to one's soul. However, some people's eyes are anti-theft windows. Those without enough skills can only feel distraught.
Nonetheless, Jiang Chen still drove me to my house. I thanked him for sending me home, but he didn't seem to have any gratitude towards me accompanying him for the night. But I decided not to fuss about it.
I got out of the car and prepared to close the door. While I was closing I couldn't help but peek a look at him. This is the after-effect of being in a one-sided love for too long. Even during the four years that we were together, I still peek at him subconsciously. To the point where when he was taking ophthalmology he suspected that I had suffered from strabismus.
His right hand was on the steering wheel and left arm pressed on his stomach. He was frowning as though he was waiting for the sound of the door to close.
In the end, I didn't close the door. I stick my body in and asked him like a plea, "Why not you come to my house? I'll cooked noodles for you. Will be fast, I can do it in ten minutes."
He shook his head, "It's okay, I'll be fine after taking medicine."
I went in the car fully and sat down with my arms crossed. "Up to my house for noodles! If not, I won't get out of your car."
Jiang Chen turned to look at me and sighed, "Let's go."
I smiled and hopped out of the car. Bringing him up four storeys of stairs to my rented apartment.
I poured him a cup of water and went to the kitchen. Thinking that since instant noodles isn't very healthy, I cooked vermicelli and added two eggs for him instead. When I came out with the noodles, he was already asleep while leaning against the sofa's armrest.
I placed the bowl on the table, squatted in front of him thinking whether I should wake him up or not. I even contemplated for a long time whether I should secretly kiss him like how it is in the movies. Or should I used my finger to outline his features? Or should I just silently watch him sleep while I cry.
In the end I just tapped on his shoulder and said, "Jiang Chen, the noodle's ready."
Some things are like being in a competition. Since you decided to withdraw from the match, you have no rights to compete again. You can only watch in agony. That's why, Liu Xiang, I understand your pain in withdrawing from the Olympics.
Jiang Chen's eyelids fluttered a little, opening slightly to look at me, and shut it again.
Hence, I pushed him again, "Wake up, the noodle's getting soggy."
He made a "tch" sound and pushed my hand off with his eyes closed. "Stop fooling around, I'm very tired."
Perhaps he sounded as though it was meant to be, I thought it felt a bit intimate..
I hugged my knees while seated on the floor, looking at him absentmindedly, or at a corner. Suddenly I felt like I'm really pitiful until I entered a dimension with no one else.* (T/N: I'm guessing she fell asleep.)
After I was done feeling miserable, I looked up and saw Jiang Chen eating the noodles and watching television. The volume's very low, but he was watching it attentively.
I turned to look at the television, it's currently airing a basketball match. A black man's head slammed onto the armpit of a white man who was shooting. The white man fell to the ground and tossed around in agony.
If I'm the black guy I would have reported the white man. Armpits vs Head, this is obviously racism.
Jiang Chen finished the noodles, asked for a tissue to wipe his mouth and said that he will be going.
Since there aren't any excuses to make him stay longer, I can only tell him to drive back safely.
When he walked to the door, he turned back to look at me, as though he was hinting something. I had no choice but to stand up and walked towards him saying, "I will just send you to the door. I wore heels for the entire night and my legs are breaking. If I were to send you down I still have to climb back up four storeys again."
Jiang Chen leaned on the door waiting for me to walk in front of me. He suddenly said, "Chen Xiaoxi, have you never, ever felt that you have done me wrong?"
This is a classic reverse questioning. An obvious answer hidden within the question to prove a point. After a short breakdown of the question I decided, that Jiang Chen probably thinks that I should and must feel that I have done him wrong. The only thing that I'm not sure, is that whether this question is meant for the breakup three years ago, or it's for my laziness in not wanting to walk him down the apartment.
I thought for a while. No matter what he is referring to, I will still be the one in the wrong. It's not that I can't apologize. Therefore, I put my legs together, arms by my side and decidedly to apologise sincerely in an army position. But Jiang Chen didn't even wait for me to finish my series of actions. He gave me one last look and went down the stairs.
This time round I understood his expression. Nothing but dislike, detest, disgust, etcetera. I could understand that, as I felt disgusted by myself too.