Chapter 14 - Mao’s Live Broadcast 2




The first live broadcast lasted for 20 minutes. Seeing that it was almost time for Shen Yu to get off work, he hastily shut off the live broadcasting platform. He cleared up all the browsing history and sorted back the camera into its original position then pretended that nothing had happened.
Shen Yu returned home a little late today. When the door made moving noises, he was already hungry to the point his stomach was rumbling with hunger. He just stared at the doorway while anxiously waiting. Unexpectedly, only a little brown teddy bear doll with the height of half a human entered the house door.
Shen Yu, who carried the doll while entering through the door, caught the sight of the cat that crouched at the doorway, bending his body in a very intimate manner. “Did you wait for a long time? I brought a gift for you today.”
Meow!? There was a gift too! What kind of gift was it? Could it be that it was the doll in his hands?
Shen Yu placed the silly teddy bear on the sofa and even kept adjusting its position so the teddy bear’s head was facing the direction of his nest.
En? Male god, what are you doing? Did you buy a fake doll to keep me company?
“Oscar, come here.” Shen Yu waved his hands at him.
Xu Mao Mao strided over as if he were catwalking. Shen Yu took out something round from the bag, which looked very strange. It was a strip of slender tuna in the shape of biting its own tail.
Shen Yu exerted his strength slightly to restrain him from moving and put on this fish-designed strip on his neck quickly and carefully.
“This is a tracking collar. If ever you wander off recklessly again in the future, I would be able to find you back,” Shen Yu said softly. His voice carried a kind of implied promise; it even seemed to be mixed with self-blame.
It turned out this collar was the gift…… This…this is a little bit hardcore! <sup>1</sup>
Xu Mao Mao with his brain hole <sup>2</sup> had already turned crooked with all kinds of training play and driving the car <sup>3</sup> flourishing inside his head, unrestrained <sup>4</sup> . He unconsciously bowed his head and licked the ‘fish head’ below his chin.
Shen Yu smiled gently and prevented him from licking the collar. “Alright, I’m going to cook for you. Don’t eat the fake fish.”
【Received love values from Shen Yu +100】
Mi. <sup>5</sup> What was I doing? Male god, don’t misunderstand me. I really wasn’t interested in it!
Xu Mao Mao pulled his head away in annoyance. Using his paw, he flicked lightly behind his neck and raised his head higher very handsomely. He used his actions to express that he didn’t want to sell cuteness in these kinds of silly methods. He was already a Cat God now who could do live broadcasts online to sell wisdom.
After the dinner, Shen Yu combed his fur for a very long time that he now looked like a beautiful cat prince. Xu Mao Mao felt a little bit nervous. He was afraid that he would be beaten up once again with the idea of bringing him together to a blind date. But after Shen Yu took care of his appearance, he only brought him to the front of the teddy bear and let him and the teddy bear sit together.
That teddy bear was very tall. From Xu Mao Mao’s point of view, he could only see its furry and gigantic body from top to bottom. It was definitely not even a little bit cute, okay!
”Be obedient. Don’t move.” Shen Yu stroked him gently. He held his handphone towards him and the teddy bear. It seemed that he was taking pictures.
Xu Mao Mao on the other hand maintained his motionless and upright sitting posture for a few seconds, letting him take pictures of himself while using his peripheral view to stealthily glance at him.
The corner of Shen Yu’s mouth slightly raised and seemed to be very pleased.
“Okay, just place it here.” Shen Yu patted the only teddy. “Don’t scratch and break it. Understand?”
“Meow.” Hmmp, I didn’t like plush toys either.
Xu Mao Mao jumped down from the sofa and posed his butt towards it to show his complete lack of interest in it.
He didn’t pay attention to the teddy bear’s two mung bean sized eyes which kept turning and emitting two points of faint red light in split seconds.
——Right. This teddy bear doll was exactly the battle result of Shen Yu wiping out the electronic city after getting off work in advance. After explaining that he wanted to monitor the house pet to the shop assistant, the shop assistant just let him choose a better surveillance camera and place those inside the teddy bear.
“Please feel reassured. Our family products are absolutely concealed and long-lasting. I guarantee your family pet’s each and every movement can be monitored in time. It only requires this kind of light stroke in your phone to be able to rotate the camera lens. Of course, there’s absolutely no problem with night-mode monitoring either. It’s also waterproof and fireproof……”.
Shen Yu, who was bowing his head to sweep through his phone to experiment its functions, thought to himself that it was indeed not bad.
The naive Xu Mao Mao who was ignorant and unaware <sup>6</sup> brought the webcam from the studyroom and dragged it to the small coffee table to live broadcast his daily wisdom right when Shen Yu left the house everyday.
At the beginning, he didn’t know what should be live broadcasted. After all, he himself was only a cat. It wasn’t similar to others’ live broadcasts, which the master also participated in. He could only add tricks by himself.
There were many methods to demonstrate his intelligence, such as writing characters and drawing pictures and so on. Xu Mao Mao was worried that showing off too much would make it bizarre. So, he just chose to read a book, which was much more low profile in comparison. However, the viewers seemed to not be very interested in the cat flipping a book. They were commenting <sup>7</sup> on the bullet screen. <sup>8</sup>
【Anchor Da da, I want to take a look at your house’s water dispenser. Can you move closer?】
【Right, ah. I haven’t made up my mind to purchase it before. I would like to take a look at how it works.】
【Can you live broadcast when your family master is drinking water?】
【Anchor Da da, why don’t you say anything ya?】
Xu Mao Mao:….
“Meow.”
If I said anything, could you guys understand? Hmmp, stupid!
【Haha. There is only a cat shouting. Is it unlikely that this live broadcasting room doesn’t have an anchor?】
【Based on what upstairs <sup>9</sup> said, it seems like no one has indeed appeared before. It shouldn’t really have started live broadcasting by itself?】
【Perhaps it is exactly Your Majesty Cat who is the anchor.】
Xu Mao Mao: You guys have found the truth!
【Yi! How frightening! 】
【How could it be? It’s obviously very cute ah~~ Cat anchor Da da, we would like to watch you drinking water from that fxcking expensive water dispenser. Can we watch~~ 】
【Haha. The upstairs is dimwitted. How could a cat understand you? 】
Xu Mao Mao casted away his beard and rushed angrily towards the water dispenser. Unexpectedly, you dared to underestimate me? I’ll let you guys see for a while the smartest cat in the entire world!
In order to let that idiotic fool who doubted him(MC) to see clearly, he even specially adjusted the webcam’s angle so it was aimed at the water dispenser even better. Then, he went to the screen and gave out a domineering ‘look well’ expression in his eyes. He moved closer to the front of the water dispenser. Then, he lowered his head and drank water in a calm and unhurried way.
After all, it was the local tyrant’s water dispenser. Therefore, the filtered water tasted very pure yet very natural and even tasted sweet. He also liked to drink it very much.
After drinking a few mouthfuls, he also lifted up his head and went towards the webcam. He used force to meow vigorously at first tone <sup>10</sup> .His little expression of being proud of himself seemed to be contemptuous.
This action immediately caused the live broadcasting room to start to explode.
【Fxck. It really can drink water!!!】
【Ah ah ah. Look at its tsundere expression! Blood sprouted on my entire face <sup>11</sup> !】
【Could it be that it’s able to understand our request?】
【The person who just said dimwitted come out! 】
【……..Ok, I will slap my face. Ao Ao Ao Ao <sup>12</sup> 】
【This water dispenser functions pretty well ah. It drank a lot of water. It seems like I also need to get one for my family Majesty. Ying Ying, my purse QAQ】
【Ao ao ao. Look at his tail swinging when he is drinking water. Dying out of cuteness. Really want to catch it】
【Want to catch +1】
【Upstairs, could you control your sinful hands at once?】
【Ah, I don’t care about it. I will just grab my pillow! Itchy hands <sup>13</sup> 】
【My nose itches. I want to suck a mouthful of cat】
……
【Received love values from Fish Demon +1】
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【Received love values from Meow Meow Meow +2】
【Received love values from Pincy +1】
Xu Mao Mao was satisfied to hear the rapidly increasing little bell’s notifications. Just then, he raised his head arrogantly. Then, he used his front paw to wipe his mouth gracefully. He returned to the front of the computer screen and used both paws together strenuously to push the mouse and look at netizens’ comments.
【Cat Anchor Da da? How did you disappear?】
【Can you live broadcast climbing the shelf for us?】
Xu Mao Mao curled his lips. How could Zhen <sup>14</sup> let you, these groups of wicked people commanding me to do whatever they commanded? Did they know what ‘stop before going too far’ is <sup>15</sup> ?
He was well versed in the ‘quitting while one is ahead <sup>16</sup> ’ principle. He was also worried that having too much content in first live broadcasting would cause the netizens to lose interest. Therefore, he firmly closed the live broadcast room. Afterwards, he dragged the webcam and so on back to the study room and cleared up all the traces in the computer.
He just planned to satisfy one or two requests from the little devil netizens today. So, Xu Mao Mao’s itinerary for today was completed.
Live broadcasting made the cat very tired. After he confirmed that everything was placed back in its original position, he was already paralyzed beside that teddy bear. He squinted his eyes in satisfaction as he fell asleep while listening to the sound effect of increasing love values.
And at the pet store where the preparation for the opening was barely completed, Shen Yu, who took a break while being busy and watched the entire process of live broadcasting: “……”
Footnotes
<ol>重口/重口味- intense/hardcore. 脑洞”则是大脑中需要用想象力去填充的“洞穴”,即进行“脑补”的场所。 Letting imagination ran wild [天马行空]Idioms Kitten Meowing Sound. 无知无觉 According to a native speaker, na han actually means shouting/cheering. However, they are commenting here but na han also could be applied here as they are basically spamming words with !!! 留言浮动板上 actually refer to dan mu[bullet screen] . Upstairs refers to the message before in chat . Mandarin has four types of tone in pronouncing words. The vocals would have a line above them, indicating the tones. The first tone is high and flat. You can refer to the link below if you want. https://www.echineselearning.com/blog/chinese-tongue-twister-mom-rides-a-horse According to baidu, it means to have a nosebleed. The sound of wailing. Shou Yang-Eager to try. ‘I’, used by Emperors. Idiom. Idiom</ol>