I went back to my room. Today was exhausting. I fought Gil, the Special Rank Exorcist, and had a meeting with the #1 Exorcist, Cyrus. I’ve officially been recognised by the strongest Exorcists in the world. It’s a heavy cross to bear.
On top of that, I have to deal with the upcoming selection process for the expedition. For better or for worse, the students at the Academy are pretty confident in themselves. That means the people coming to the selection matches are definitely going to be capable and confident. Obviously, I was worried. I wasn’t worried about whether I could win; I was worried about whether or not my heart could handle the pressure.
Now that I think about it, I’ve been dealing with some kind of unfamiliar feeling ever since I came back from the Twilight. It’s been so peaceful, as if the time I spent out there was just a lie. I’ve had nothing in particular to be afraid of; I’ve simply gone to school, studied, and gone back home. It was all well and good, but for some reason I’ve had this uneasy feeling the whole time.
“…I’m home,” I said to the empty room. I knew the room was empty. But saying “I’m home” every time I came home has been a habit since I lived in the Third Barriered City. Even if I know there’s no one waiting for me at home, I don’t want to admit it.
But that wasn’t true this time. There was someone here.
“Uh…”
“Ah…”
Yeah, it was Sherry. And… she was naked.
Well, to be precise, she’s wearing a towel, so it’s not like everything’s on display, but still. Her beautiful skin and the water dripping from her hair lended the whole scene an incredibly sensuous aura.
“Uh… um…”
Confused, I immediately made sure I was in the right room. Yep. This is the corner room. Definitely mine. The simple furniture in the room is also definitely mine. So… why is Sherry standing in my room, naked…
“It’s not what you’re thinking!”
“Uh, so, what are you doing here, exactly?”
“Well… I actually left some stuff here…”
“Uh… You live in the next room; how exactly did your stuff get in here?”
“…Before you moved in, I was using this place as storage. That’s how…”
“Mhm…”
“S-so I ended up working up a bit of sweat while I was moving my stuff…”
“Mhm…”
“So I decided to go ahead and take a shower…”
“…You could’ve done that in your own room.”
“W-well, I wanted to wash up as soon as possible!”
“…Okay. I get it so… please put some clothes on. Please…”
“Ah…”
And suddenly, her towel fell. I immediately turned away and waited outside in front of my own room.
“N-noooooooooooo!!!”
I did not see her full chest and her slender, elegant body. Yep. Definitely didn’t see anything. No, really…
***
“Sorry about that…”
“No, it’s fine. You’re making me dinner; that’s more than enough.”
I was in Sherry’s room and was being treated to her cooking. Sherry apparently cooks all of her own meals.
“Is it good?”
“Mm… it’s amazing!”
“I see. That’s good.”
She made Hamburg steak and corn soup, with bread on the side. I was quite surprised to learn that she even made the bread herself. Her cooking was amazing. It was awe-inspiring. I only know the basics of cooking – just enough to survive – so I really thought she was amazing. My only options in the Twilight were grilled food and stew, so her incredible cooking served as a good reference for me to learn.
“Are you going to attend the selection matches tomorrow?”
“Yeah…”
“Wasn’t expecting that. I thought there was no way you were going to participate.”
“Well… a lot happened.”
To be honest, I don’t want to participate. There are plenty of students who don’t enter. Apparently they still show up to watch, though, and treat it a bit like a festival. It’s been held annually for the past two years – right after I went into the Twilight. As a result, I’d never heard of it until recently.
Only a few people from each city are allowed to go to the First Barriered City every year. They get to practice fighting monsters in the Twilight and even get an audience with the royal family.
The royal family are the descendants of a certain bloodline. They are also said to be the hope of mankind, but not much else is known about them. The only people who really know details about the royals are probably their aides and the Special Rank Exorcists. That expedition – and what it entails – is exactly why the selection matches are so exciting. After all, being selected means you’re worthy of carrying the human race forwards.
“By the way, have you ever been selected for the expedition, Sherry?”
“…Not yet.”
“That’s what’s really surprising. I thought you’d definitely be selected, given your strength.”
“I’ve only really gotten strong in the past year. That’s why.”
“…So you were weak for a long time, too.”
“Yeah. I didn’t have any amazing skill or talent, really. I worked my butt off to climb my way up to being a Rank 1 Exorcist. So yeah, in that sense, I’m like you.”
“I didn’t know we had that in common. I’m a little surprised.”
“Haha… yeah, that’s true.”
We chatted idly for a bit, then returned to the topic of the selection matches. “Are you going to use that spell at the selection matches?”
“You mean [Invisible Blade]?”
“Yeah. You’ll definitely get picked if you use it.”
“…I’m not sure. I was thinking about just bringing a regular old broadsword…”
“I guess you really don’t want to stand out, right? After all, you could’ve told everyone that you beat me when you first transferred here. I wouldn’t have denied it, either. But instead, you decided to keep your head down. You keep quiet even when you’re bullied, too.”
“You noticed the bullying?”
“Everyone’s noticed. Do you know what people call you? ‘That tryhard cross-dresser,’ they say.”
“Ah… I’ve gotta admit, that’s pretty high praise. Jokes aside, they’re not really wrong about me… I’m pretty sure I’m not a cross-dresser, though.”
“Have you never wanted to stand up for yourself? I’ve kept quiet because you haven’t said anything about it, but it honestly pisses me off. We’re all humans; we shouldn’t be fighting with each other. We all came here to fight together in the Twilight one day…”
“I understand the way you feel about it, but… I guess it just doesn’t feel real to me. The Twilight was so much more intense, after all. That cruel, life-or-death world was all I knew for so long, after all. So… I don’t know; I guess I’m confused about what to do. And as for the bullying, I’m afraid that if I fight back, everyone will be scared of me. With my strength… I have a feeling that’s how it’d end up.”
“Are you an idiot?!”
“Huh…?”
Sherry stood up from the chair with a thud, her eyes brimming with anger.
“Your strength is not something that should be feared! It should be respected and admired! You survived in that hellish world for two years, burned those skills into your body, and attained strength so amazing it can’t be properly expressed in words! So… so don’t be so afraid of people. If nothing else, you can know that I’ll always respect you.”
“Sherry…”
She held my hand tightly. I felt the warmth of her hand and experienced the sensation that I was truly alive. I was scared. After all, I’m a Duskmarked. I have abnormal strength, and I’m no longer even close to being human. Twilight is simply poisonous to normal humans. On the other hand, it strengthens demons. And I… I gained my strength in the Twilight. That’s why I always thought that I was closer to being a demon than a human. I’d pretended I didn’t notice these fears. I pretended that I didn’t know I was afraid. Every time I looked at my right arm, I realised I had no idea what I really was. But Sherry told me that my power should be respected. That… made me happy. I felt like someone had finally accepted me. That was the first time I ever felt happy to be back…
“Sherry, I want you to look at my right arm.”
“Is that…”
“Stage 5 Twilight Syndrome. No, it’s probably progressed even further than that. I’ve been like this for over a year. That’s why I’ve always thought that I wasn’t human. Am I… am I still human?”
“…That’s not something that can be judged just from your appearance. Whether or not you’re a human… it depends on your heart. If you are prepared to fight demons, if you’re willing to fight for the sake of humanity, and if you still have a human heart… then you’re definitely a human being.”
“I see… I think I wanted someone to tell me that. It’s time for me to move forwards.”
“…Have you made up your mind?”
“Yeah. I’m human. I’ll fight for humanity.”
“It may sound a little weird, but… I guess you’re kind of like a light, cutting through the Twilight… wait, that sounds a little poetic, right?”
“I like it. I like that poem.”
“What?! Don’t call it a poem! That’s embarrassing!”
“Hahaha… You’re definitely a poet. Do you write your poems down in a notebook?”
“How did you know?! Did you see it?!”
“Wait… really?”
“You tricked meeeee!!!”
It was an incredibly silly conversation. And yet, somehow, it was comforting.
Alright. I’m ready. Let’s do this; let’s go. As far as we possibly can.